Have you ever had a friendship that you keep feeling like you are getting more and more distant? You don’t text much, you never hang out, and they’re always bailing on plans? It always leave me asking myself a million questions, like “Did I do something wrong?” “Do they not like me anymore?”
It’s a really shitty feeling, and I think a lot of people (especially those in college) face this problem. Here are 4 ways to try to fix the issue.
1. Think about what else could be going on.
Are they having problems with their significant other? Are they really stressed out with school? Do they have a job or are they in a lot of clubs and are just really busy? There are so many reasons your friend could seem to be ignoring you.
2. Ask yourself if you’ve been making an effort.
Sure, they don’t ask you to hang out anymore, but do YOU ask them? It can be hard to put yourself out there when it feels like your friend may not want to be around you, but if you aren’t making an effort, than who will? Ask if they want to study together or go to the bars this weekend. In most cases, they’ll be glad you asked and work something out.
3. Consider how they’ve always treated you.
Maybe this is a sign to get out of the friendship. Have they always been shady? Have they ever made you feel bad about yourself? Do they always choose other people over you? Some friendships aren’t made to last, and if this friend has never treated you the way they should have, it might be time to end it.
4. Confront them.
If you’re anything like me and not a confrontational person, than it can be really hard to bring up touchy subjects like this. However, this is the best way to find out what’s going on. A simple “Hey, I’ve noticed we’ve been distant lately. Wanna get coffee and talk about it?” text could solve everything.
In most cases, your friend has probably noticed that you’ve been getting distant too, and they’re thinking the exact same things. Plus, it’s always a good idea to check in on your friends if you haven’t in a while. It’s easy to overthink everything (I’m the QUEEN of overthinking), but more times than not, there’s just been a misunderstanding and with a little effort, your friendship will be back to normal.