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Give Yourself Permission to Be Yourself


I have been trying for weeks to write some amazing female empowerment post.

 I’ve been trying for weeks to write some alternative angle post on girl hate.

I guess what’s changed is that I’ve realized not every post has to be amazing and not everything I say has to be profound; the thoughts you have are valuable and worthwhile even if they aren’t an antecedent for an epiphany.

This isn’t The Fault in Our Stars. Not everything has to have some grand metaphor...that’s actually kinda bullshit. Sometimes a cigarette is just a cigarette and you’re not Ye, you’re just Kanye.

Not everything you do has to be astonishing. You are valuable just for existing – there doesn’t have to be a battle of “am I worth the space I take up?”, or “should I say this opinion? Would anyone really care?”

Additionally, you don’t have to validate the things you like to anyone. 

I’ve realized that I could write about make-up, music, mental health, or political issues and all are worthwhile topics. I hate when I feel myself limiting my abilities because I don’t want to be too “basic girl” or too…outspoken? Why operate in some middle ground? As long as you like what you’re doing, that’s all that really matters.


I hate when I see my friends shying away from what they like, or feeling that what they enjoy is embarrassing. There is nothing wrong with liking the color pink, or wearing Lululemon, if that’s what you like to do. Conversely, girls who like alternative music or cars can like the things they like without being tested on their knowledge of said likes or accused of being “posers”. Someone’s style doesn’t determine their intelligence, friendliness, or any other personality trait.

So often I feel like we see girls working so hard just to validate the things they like just for the sake that they like them. Even that sentence. “So often I feel like” …why not just “so often we see”? I don’t need to qualify what I’m saying so that others will be more comfortable. It’s okay to exist unapologetically.

I guess if there’s a point that I’m trying to drive home, it’s that self-value is inherent, not situational. You don’t need someone else to give you permission to operate, and you don’t need to apologize once you’ve given yourself said permission.

A quote that I read recently was “You are absolutely gorgeous, and that is the least interesting thing about you.”

All the time, beauty is used as a qualifier or just stated factually. I do think it’s true, you are pretty, and beautiful, and sexy, and gorgeous and you do that all on your own. Your beauty is not dependent on someone else’s view of you. However, beauty is not the end all be all. Sure, I can be beautiful, but does anyone want to be just beautiful? 

That sounds pretty damn boring to me. I’d rather be intelligent, and witty, and inquisitive, and curious. The good news is everyone is capable of doing both at the same time.




After reading Her Campus for a couple years, Zoe has decided to give it a shot.
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