It’s an unspoken truth that people only join Greek organizations to widen their dating circle. Why don’t we have matchmakers anymore, you ask? Because fraternities and sororities fill that role. Because of this, 3wheels2years2days is definitely qualified to explain to you, faithful reader, how to get through rush, whether or not you’re participating.
1. If you’re rushing, talk about it all the time. That guy you sat next to one time in Intro Bio on the first day of class really wants to hear about the conversation you had with that one Greek senior about your middle school relationship with Crocs.
2. Learn Greek. I shouldn’t have to tell you that. All srat/frat meetings are conducted entirely in Greek. These institutions are all about upholding customs, obviously.
3. Take a selfie every day starting at the beginning of rush so that you have a record of your increasing fatigue and self-doubt. This way, you’ll see the immediate glow you’ll get once you’re officially a sister or brother. Your hair will be shinier. You will be taller. Your face will be free of pimples. You’ll never have to deal with a weird rash again, because now you are cool.
4. Instead of being yourself to get to know members of your favorite org, model your behavior after the sitcom character whom you think is the funniest. While Chandler Bing might not make the best first impression, he’s a sweetie and they will surely be able to see this through the tough outer shell of self-deprecating humor you put up.
5. If your friends are rushing but you aren’t, ignore them when they try to tell you how stressed they are and need help deciding which group to focus on. This will remind them that they chose to ride this train and have thus sacrificed the love and affection of anyone who does not hop on with them. If that’s a little too serious for you, just shove Greek yogurt in their faces (or on their faces!).
6. If you are *interested* in someone who is rushing, be by their side at all times that they aren’t occupied with rushing, ensuring that they will know that you’ll literally never leave them alone. Make grand gestures, like bringing them a daily care package at lunch including soap, deodorant, and cheese. Everyone has to see that you’re showering this person with affection; you’ve got to claim your territory so you know you’ll have social capital in this new Greek world.
There you have it. You can handle rush like a pro, no matter which side you’re on!
Image credits: Giphy.com