My day was about to be made when, around 11:00 am, I left the Squad and headed to Peirce. I sat down and looked at my phone, only to find that the internet was abuzz with the rumblings of a royal pregnancy. And upon sighting postings from sources like CNN and The Guardian, I realized this wasn’t just another tabloid baby craze, but the real deal. So I did what any proper anglophile would do–set out to work getting ready to celebrate Kate Middleton’s pregnancy. Get ready everyone…the British baby is coming! The British baby is coming!
Step One: A Name
What is the royal couple most likely to name their baby-to-be, you ask? Have no fear. We’ve laid out some of the most likely options for this future prince or princess.
For a Boy:
1. Philip — An obvious and classy homage to William’s grandfather, Prince Philip, Duke
of Edinburgh.
2. Edward — A tribute to Edward John Spencer, Viscount Althorp and father to Princess Di.
3. Andrew — Perhaps the royal couple will paying respects to their beloved alma mater, St. Andrew’s University in Scotland–where they met.
4. Michael — Kate’s father, Michael Middleton, would share this name with his first grandchild.
5. Arthur — A popular name among British royalty and animated aardvarks alike!
For A Girl:
1. Diana — I’m already teary at the thought of it, though it’s more likely a middle name.
2. Elizabeth — Though things might get a little awkward if the Queen and her great-grandaughter share a name, the younger of the two can always go by Liz or Lizzie.
3. Caroline — A modernized shout-out to Kate’s mom, Carole Middleton.
4. Alice — Prince William’s great-grandmother’s name lends itself to a Wonderland-themed nursery!
5. Sarah or Jane — Both names of Diana’s sisters, and less typically Royal than some other options.
Step Two: A Nanny
While I hereby nominate myself (I’m happy to fax a resume over to the Palace upon request), I figured it would only be fair to give some others a chance, too.
1. Mary Poppins — A spoonful of sugar is sure to calm a finicky infant princess–not to mention all the stuff in that carpet bag!
2. Mrs. Doubtfire — A lesson in cross-dressing and tough love can’t hurt, right?
3. Maria Von Trapp — She’s sure to have the royal baby singing duets with Adele’s child in no time!
4. Nanny McPhee — A fellow Brit who proves that you can’t judge a book by it’s cover.
5. Jo Frost — TV’s beloved “Supernanny,” JoJo (also British) won’t be afraid to put this little prince or princess in the naughty throne!
Step Three: Outfits
With a Mom like Kate, this baby is sure to be well-dressed. Here are a couple of outfits we’re sure we’ll spot the second the paparazzi meet the little one.
Outfit #1: Baby Girl Goes For A Playdate with Blue Ivy
United States of Benneton Dress and Hunter “First Boot” Rainboots from Nordstrom.com
Outfit #2: Baby Boy Goes To A Polo Match With Dad
Burberry “Mini Treague” Strip T-Shirt, Burberry “Langston” Jeans, Nordstrom “Baby Shaker” Sweater, and TOMS “Classic Tiny” Slip-On from Nordstrom.com
Outfit #3: Baby Girl Has Tea With The Queen (Great-Grand)Mother
Burberry “Delia” dress, PLH headbands, Stride Rite “PolkaBuffy” flats from Nordstrom.com
Outfit #4: Baby Boy Hangs With Uncle Harry
“Keep Calm and Carry Me” onesie from Zazzle.com and Vans sneakers from Nordstrom.com
Duchess Kate, on the off-chance (ok, there is no chance…) you’re reading this, please consider this our baby shower gift. We know our invitations are in the mail.