Valentine’s Day is easily one of my favorite holidays! I love the idea that we have a day designated to love and this specific day is our opportunity to express love in whatever way we feel is right. However, because we’re all different, here are five different Valentine’s Day-inspired dates or rendezvous that are based on the five love languages! The whole idea of love languages revolves around how you show and accept affection, so I think Valentine’s Day is a great way to generate some ideas of what may best benefit your happiness and relationship with those you care about.
- Acts of Service
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Valentine’s Day Idea: bake or cook together, helping with the little things and providing little pieces of relief and support
This is actually my love language, so I selfishly decided to start with it! I love making things, hence why this article is in existence, so baking is a second love to me. I used to bake with my mom and sister when I was little, and my mom used to bake separate cakes for me and my sister on our birthday so we each had our own cakes since we are twins and share a birthday. That meant a lot to me both when I was little and as I got older, and I think that is a very sweet gesture to show someone how much you care about them. I also live in Ohio and am still just as surprised how cold it is every year, despite living here my entire life. I believe doing anything out of your way to ensure warmth or comfort to someone is another very sweet act (this can head in the direction of the physical touch love language as well). For example, getting someone those little hand warmers is the highlight of my day any time I find them scattered somewhere in my apartment that my mom picked up for me, since I am perpetually cold. I have also knitted my mom a few scarves that she wears very adorably on her way to work all throughout winter, so we are both quite acts of service in that sense. Overall, any situation where you go out of your way to provide comfort or alleviate some possible stress or dread from whoever you care about is a great way to go!
- Words of Affirmation
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Valentine’s Day Idea: post-it written signs of affection
Okay, I was very jazzed about this idea! Allow me to explain. I like to write my sister little post-it notes whenever I have a few minutes, so there are quite a few days she wakes up to a little reminder that can hopefully start her day off a little better. I am also a hopeless romantic and think hand-written letters are one of the most endearing things you can do for someone. The acts of service in me loves to send small packages to my friends with a little card reminding them how loved they are, which I did at the beginning of Covid-season and highly recommend; it made my heart feel very warm by the end of it all. I also thought it would be a sweet idea to just stick little notes around the person you care for that are completely random and adorable. I am a geek for dad jokes, so I think it would be cute to stick a note to a lamp or somewhere that says something cheesy like, “you light up my world.” Or just random loving notes do the trick as well to make anyone that’s words of affirmation smile!
- Quality Time
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Valentine’s Day Idea: Dances in random places, board games and pillow forts, etc.
I was most excited to write this one, because it is by far the most creative one you can get! Honestly, if you’re looking for more inspiration, watch any indie romance movie. I suggest 500 Days of Summer, Lady Bird or anything else with a montage sequence that will end up destroying your heart in the end. I feel like dancing is one of those things that is just fun, even if there is not music. The whole point of this love language is that eye contact and physical and emotional presence is available, so just be present. As someone with immensely too many emails and has a hard time stepping away from my phone, make it part of the routine! Put some Spotify playlists on and take breaks between the chaos. I feel like Valentine’s Day is this really stressful holiday because people tend to think the whole day is supposed to be planned and perfect, but if you ask anyone, oftentimes I believe that quality time in segments is just as wonderful. So grab some chocolate, lay out some blankets in tent-form and dance in the kitchen, because it’s honestly more fun (and covid-friendly right now) than any dinner reservation could be.
- Gifts
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Valentine’s Day Idea: Etsy-inspired gifts or anything from the heart
I feel like the term gift as a love language gives it such a bad reputation. The love language book that started this trend, The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts, explains that the sentimentality behind the gifts is what make this language so special, and I thought that was very wholesome and telling. I love making handmade gifts for other people because I think that it gives it a piece of your heart and makes the gift more meaningful. I often feel like people do not love that because it feels kind of childish when I present it to them, so to the people that appreciate this and have this as their love language, thank you! Of what I’ve been able to tell from creating and gifting presents from the heart, it does seem like people do love and appreciate when you take the time to give something that you put time into. So even if you didn’t physically make it, we were not all born to be Picasso (which I have learned after many attempts at painting), just putting effort and time into anything shows a lot about a person.
- Physical Touch
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Valentine’s Day Idea: Being present throughout the day
I could not forget to include The Notebook at least somewhere in here, and this felt very fitting! Physical touch seems so obvious, but even just doing separate things where you are together can be so peaceful and comforting. I do not tend to notice how non-present I am until I stay buried in my thoughts and work for hours at a time without conversations or physical contact. Even just holding hands or something really small can bring a lot of warmth to stay connected with someone, and I think that is really important to remind yourself of. I’m a big people person, and I gladly welcome hugs and physical affection most days, but it is also really important to understand that not everyone is comfortable with that constant affection or just does not want that as regularly, so double-checking that someone is comfortable with physical touch is a really important thing to remember. Overall, physical affection is a great way to stay present with someone and be mindful that you get to have them in your life.
Whether you are with someone you love romantically, your soulmate of any form or are having a bit of a self-love day, I hope your Valentine’s Day is filled with all the best moments with all the best examples of love and the languages we use to express it!