When people talk about relationships with their friends, co-workers, etc. and they explain how long the duration of their relationship is, the responses typically heard are “Aww that’s so cute!”, “You guys seem like the perfect couple then!”, and “Do you guys plan on moving in together one day?”
“Stop!” or “Hold the phone, geesh people!” is what is probably flashing through your head while trying to think of responses to give to them. Or you are probably thinking about all the problems you are facing in your relationship.
To have this type of personal reaction is normal. A lot of people feel the same way and you are unaware of it.
People come up to me, mostly friends and they ask me relationship advice on issues like trust, lack of public affection, lack of romance time with their partner, and communication issues. Well today I will tackle these relationship issues and provide you with my advice on how to overcome them!
Question 1 :
What if I pursue a current relationship with trust issues from my past, due to previous bad relationships, or even have issues opening up to people due to old betrayals?
Answer:
If you have personal issues with trust and it’s effecting your current relationship, be honest with your partner. A huge part of trust is starting off with honesty, so make sure that you do your part on being truthful with the person you care and love!
If you have trust issues due to a past relationship, the best way to fully move on from it, is to close up the chapter. For example, in a book you can have a range from twenty to fifty chapters or more, in order to continue to read the rest of the book, you have to finish up the previous chapters.
In order to do this for a current relationship, try to reach out to the person from your past that damaged your view on trust in all of your relationships. You don’t have to meet up with that person because you would probably have an urge to snap at them, but try and get their contact information from some where.
If you have a tendency to keep your old friends phone numbers written down on notepad or something along that nature, search for them on that list, or you can search for them on Facebook, Twitter, or any other popular social network. This method is also effective for reaching out to previous friends, or anyone from your past (outside of relationship wise) that hurt you.
Question 2 :
My partner no longer gives me public affection, how can I change this?
Answer:
In order to receive more public affection, try talking to your partner about it and see why it decreased over time. From what I’ve noticed a lack of public affection usually does not happen on the female’s side, but on the male’s it does.
If you have been in your relationship for a year or more, this behavior is pretty normal. In the beginning of a relationship everything seems perfect in all aspects, but over time little things like public affection tend to disappear and it can hurt.
I am not a mind reader, but your partner is probably so busy with his school or work schedule, which probably has him so stressed out, that they put showing little signs of affection on the back burner.
If you forget to bring it up in conversation, then don’t be afraid to take action while being in public.
Some ladies tend to have this idea that it’s embarrassing to make the first move, but it’s not especially if you have been with the person for quite a long time. Ladies take the lead!
Question 3 :
My relationship is not as romantic as it used to be, how can I get that spark back?
Answer :
Ladies and gentlemen it’s not hard to get the romance back into a relationship. Although, it may seem like mission impossible! If you want the spark back, try to think of some cute and romantic ideas to do with your partner.
One idea that will give you some personal time with your partner, is cooking a meal together, which I explained in a previous date tips article. Cooking is a lot of fun and it gives you and your partner cute ways to use your hands for something productive!
Other ideas to get the spark back is to watch a film together, take a walk in a park, or even go on a shopping trip. Shopping can be a fun and romantic bonding experience. Plus you can buy essential supplies for yourself, or check out some nice sales !
Question 4 :
How do I fix communication problems in my relationship?
Answer:
In order to fix communication in your relationship, try to open up to your partner little by little about how your day, school, or work is going. Once you give your partner these little updates, ask your partner about how everything is going with him or her.
Starting off with basic topics is a great transition into a little conversation. Now if you want to have a conversation with your partner about more personal things, such as how do they feel about the progress of your relationship, you need to try and wait for a perfect time to bring it up. For example, if your partner has a lot of homework to do, or is doing something for work, it is best not to disturb them.
If your partner takes a break and decides to just unwind from their work, then try to get their perspective on the relationship. If your partner is curious about what part of the relationship you would like to talk about, then throw out some topics, and if they are quiet and don’t know how to respond, then start first.
Important rule to remember: relationships are all about give and take. If you want to increase things in your relationship like trust, affection, romance, and communication, then you have to give in a little and take in your partner’s perspective on things.
Hopefully all of this advice helps in advancing your relationships, and if any of you have questions regarding more relationship issues, don’t be nervous to ask me. I am more then happy to help!
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