A Word to the Wise: Putting Life in Perspective

Once in a while, we all need that friend to steer us straight, give us some quality advice and make us feel heard and reassured. Well, allow me to be that friend, a big sis if you will. These are some quotes that have really resonated with me in the past several months and have put life into perspective. These quotes have not only comforted me, but have given me a new outlook. In case you need to hear this or just need to know you’re not alone, here are some words that have really stuck with me…

 

“You can only control what you can control.”

 

This one can be easy to grasp but difficult to live by. Especially if you’re more Type A or even if you just like to be in control of every aspect of your life, which can be most of us. As humans, we like to be in control, to be the captain of our own ship. It makes sense.

My best friend always tells me, once you relinquish control from things that are simply out of your power, life becomes so much easier. What is the point in worrying and stressing about things you cannot change or make happen? All you can do is control yourself, your actions, your mindset, how you treat others and how you treat yourself (a factor we often forget). Narrowing your focus to what you have a sole influence on will take a huge weight off your shoulders and make you feel lighter, literally and figuratively.

 

“Independence isn’t loneliness.”

 

This is a lesson I learned quite the hard way since coming to college. Coming to a school so far from home, far from my family, closest friends and everything I’ve ever known was a big deal. I’ve learned so much about myself, especially how independent I can be. College is an interesting concept when you think about it. You’re living in close quarters with your schoolmates, all of similar age, little to no true alone time, kept away from the rest of the world- you’re essentially in a bubble. Since coming to college, I’ve learned I’m much more social than I thought. I truly love being around people. However, this affected me in an interesting way. It got to a point where I’d feel weird if I was alone, as if I was doing something wrong. It didn’t make sense as to why I felt so bad sometimes. Then I realized that being independent, doing things on your own, isn’t loneliness. It’s not weird, everyone does things on their own, and it’s a good thing. You have to get comfortable with being by yourself. A major lesson to learn after being on your own at college, not having your family to come home to and always having people around. This year has been a major growing experience for me, and I could not be more thankful. I have learned that I thrive in my independence, but also in being with others. It’s a balance. And it’s okay to do both. It’s healthy.

 

“Everything happens for a reason, it’s what got you here.”

 

Now, I know this one’s a cliché, but I put my own spin on it. Here is my take on it:

Every situation, whether it be good or bad, teaches us something. It’s what helps us grow and evolve. It’s what got you to where you are now, and what will get you to where you’re going. Once you accept that, you realize nothing is a waste. Everything suddenly has meaning, and that’s super comforting.

 

“Know that there will be challenges ahead, but also know you have the weapon to destroy the enemy, and that weapon is self-control and self-love.”

 

This one is courtesy of my oldest brother. He’s been my rock during some of the hardest times in my life. He’s been through stuff, which is what makes his advice resonate so much more to me, because it stems from real experience. It’s genuine. Once he said this to me, I immediately stopped and wrote it down. These words really hit home, and I didn’t want to forget them. It was so profound, yet so simple. Accept that there will be hard times in your life, it is inevitable, life isn’t perfect. However, once you know you have the power (the weapon) within you to destroy the enemy, that enemy being ourselves/our own mind, that weapon is our own self-control and our self-love. All the tools we need are inside us. Now, it’s okay to have others help when our tools need some polishing, but just know we have all we need within us. And that’s powerful.