As my days as a college student start coming to an end, I have begun reflecting back on the past three and half years I have spent at James Madison University. As a senior, I see all of the freshman walking around campus, full of innocence, naïve to the next few years they have. Being a senior is a bittersweet feeling. I have accepted that my time is coming to an end and I am beyond excited to start life post-college, but at the same time I am incredibly jealous that I no longer have a future here at JMU.
If I could somehow communicate with the freshman version of myself, I would have more than a few things to share! Each year I learned something new about myself, about friendship, about boys, booze and about the college experience in general.
Starting off with Friendship…
When my parents dropped me off in my freshman dorm, I was left with all of the freedom in the world. Living on your own is a fabulous feeling for a teenager who had only graduated from high school a few months earlier! But what you don’t realize is that you are truly alone for the first time in your life. Sure, you are surrounded by thousands of other students going through the same process, but in reality, you really want the freedom of a college freshman with company of your old friends from home.
I feared that I would never find the bond I had with my hometown friends. I found myself scared that within the first hour of being at school I had not yet found my perfect soul mates. If I could go back in time, I would tell myself to relax. The friends you make your first or even second year may not be the best friends you end up graduating with. Over time I have met some of the most amazing and important people to me. Up until my junior year, I was still meeting some people who have now become my family. And even as a senior, I am still making new friendships that will carry on far past my college years!
It is extremely important to be open to meeting new people. Just because you have made a close group of friends does not mean you should shelter yourself to that small clique. There are so many people at JMU; so many people that can bring so many different aspects to your life! It is a wonderful feeling to be able to walk around campus and wave to familiar faces you have met. No need to make a thousand best friends. Simply having the opportunity to branch out and hang out with different groups of people will make this school feel like your school.
Okay, so now you’ve made all of these “friendships” with people, but it is time to go farther than that. If I could talk to my freshman self, I would encourage her to meet more people who enjoy being in her company without being in a party atmosphere. Partying isn’t everything. (I feel as if this is a statement only a second semester senior really wants to admit!) JMU has given me a lifetime of fun that I will cherish for the rest of my life. I have had SO MUCH FUN at this school. But what happens when the fun gets old? It is important to keep in mind that drinking comes with consequences. You don’t want to look back at college and not remember all of the good times. It is important to make as many sober, fun memories as party ones.
With that being said, surround yourself with positive influences that feel the same way. This does not mean you need to write off the drinkers and partiers you’ve come across throughout the years. Just realize the true meaning these people hold in your life; take people for who they are. If these people make you laugh so hard that your stomach hurts, then great! Give them a call on a Friday night, but make sure you have friends to come over Saturday morning…
One of the most important things I have learned over the years is to accept people for who they are. Although you may have had a bad relationship with a roommate or had a nasty breakup with a boyfriend, time will eventually heal all wounds. In the moment, you may hate this person but don’t burn your bridges. You never know when this person is going to reappear in your life. You will have a great feeling leaving college knowing you had no enemies, “frenemies,” or people straight up hating your guts. With age you learn to let go more and by the time I graduate I want to leave this place knowing I tied up any loose ends I once had with my old friends!
Above all I have learned you must stay true to yourself. If you entered college as a runner, keep running. If you love to paint and do arts and crafts, keep crafting. If you are religious, keep the faith going! You must continue to do the things that make you happy. It is so easy to get lost in college. I found my transition from freshman to sophomore year difficult because I felt I had ignored a lot of the activities I had once loved. It comes with the dorm lifestyle. You are stuck in a building with nowhere to go…or so it seems. You must not lose your sense of self throughout the years. Four years is not a long time, but it is long enough to lose importance in your life. These are the years to truly find yourself, so don’t lose time by sitting around hungover – make every moment count!
So don’t let your major define you who are. Let you define who you are. Work hard so you can play hard. You willget a job one day even in this economy! You will make it work! Don’t get so caught up on taking classes that will make you this millionaire entrepreneur. Takes classes you are interested in. Stop getting caught up with what career you are going to have, that day will come later and no one, no matter how prepared, is really prepared. And that is something everyone, even the teacher’s pet can relate to.
And last but certainly not least, there is life after college! College has certainly been the best four years of my life but I am trying not to dwell on the fact that it is coming to an end. I remember as a freshman I did not even want to go home for breaks because, well, why would I ever want to leave Disney World? No parents, freedom, parties every night, all the food you can eat – what can beat that? But with life, all good things come to an end. It does not need to be this big dramatic graduation where you never look back. We go to college to set ourselves up for our future. But for all you over-achievers out there, don’t rush it. Have fun!
Personally, I think we are here to enjoy ourselves just as much as we are here to get an education. It’s all about time management. Have your cake and eat it too! Celebrate the fact that you received good grades. You don’t want to look back and only have a high GPA to show for it. Trust me, when you have a job someday, everyone will know you did well academically!