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I’m Not Moving In with My Boyfriend

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at JCU chapter.

Of course my boyfriend, Will, and I would be awesome roommates. Logistically, we both have a steady income, we know how to treat arguments, I don’t mind cleaning, he doesn’t mind making a mess, stuff like that. Socially, we have the same group of friends, we make bomb meals, we have similar interests, and we enjoy each other’s company. While I’ve always imagined us as roommates, it doesn’t seem like a beneficial idea the closer we get to reality. I’ve seen an incredible amount of friends move in with their significant others in college or straight out of college. Why rush? This past year has taught me to be independent and, let’s all say it together, selfish. We’re in our 20s! If I hear one more “my boyfriend is moving to Cincinnati, so I’m only looking for jobs out there,” I’m going to vent about it.

How am I supposed to become independent if I keep relying on my boyfriend, huh? I have to learn how to kill my own spiders. I’ll be the first one to admit I rely way too much on Will. Whether his annoyingly humble personality will agree with me or not, he’s Superman. He’s intelligent, witty, strong, generous, and completely selfless. Whatever I need, he provides. While that’s all great, I have to do some providing on my own. I can’t get into the habit of running to someone else when a problem comes my way. I have to do my taxes, fix the toilet, and cook my own meals. Spider, prepare to be squashed.    

I want a job I love, not one for convenience in location to my boyfriend. Yes, Will and I are both from the Cleveland area, but we could have jobs on opposite Cleveland ends. So what if he finds a job in Lakewood and I find one in Willoughby? I’ll find a roommate that’s not him, no worries. It’s not fair to him or me to limit our future to accommodate each other. Do I have to mention again we’re in our 20s, and it’s our time to be selfish? Before we settle down, let’s explore what life will throw at us. The worst thing I could do right now is make decisions about my future with someone else in mind.  

If Will and I lived together, I would never leave the apartment. I mean, seriously, I wouldn’t. My best friend would be in the same room as me all the time, and if he wasn’t, he would be soon. I would have absolutely no desire or motivation to leave because nothing could possibly be better than watching Netflix and eating ice cream in pajamas every Friday night with him. I would wake up, see him, go to work, call him, come home, see him, eat dinner, see him, and go to sleep. That’s what a thirty-year marriage is for.  

I get to hang out with friends! When I get home each day (assuming from work), I get to have a girls’ night every single night with one of my closest girl friends as a roommate. We’ll get to chat, eat ice cream, drink wine, watch dumb movies, have craft nights, and a whole bunch of stuff a boyfriend would never do. Sure, boyfriends are welcome all the time. But they better be gone on Pinterest Wednesdays. 

Have I mentioned the DECORATIONS? Without a doubt, Will is going to have a nerd room one day. I don’t want that in my fresh-out-of-college apartment. I get to choose colors, fabrics, and pillows that don’t have to be gender neutral. Hey there, bright green carpet, good to meet you. 

Will and I started our relationship about four and a half years ago. He’s my safety blanket. It’s no wonder my friends all ask me if I’m going to move in with him. When they ask us why we aren’t moving in together, the answer is simple. We’ll have the rest of our lives to be together, so what’s another few years on our own to figure out life?