I spent the entirety of the fall semester studying abroad in Rome, Italy. Coming back to campus after a semester of being surrounded by such new things I have been beginning to notice the new parts of me and how they are being transferred over to my lifestyle back on campus in the U.S.
Social Skills & Anxiety
After being in a new country and having to adapt my Americanized social skills to the new languages and cultures around me I thought I had been through the worst of my social dilemmas and coming back to campus being surrounded by unfamiliar peers would be a piece of cake. I was proved to be terribly wrong. No matter the situation, for most personalities meeting new people is always exciting and most times slightly terrifying. After a week of being thrown into classes with people (who do speak English, yes) but I have never met before, I quickly became aware that the anxieties of interacting with strangers is still an uncomfy experience. Though I found once I opened myself up, like I had been practicing abroad, the new conversations I had this week with faces I have never met were fruitful. Of course, they were awkward and a bit shaky but I did make some breakthroughs and even had some laughs with the people I sit in class with everyday. It’s important to remember, no matter where you’re at environment wise, meeting new people can be awkward for everyone. The anxieties you feel when approaching or being approached by a new person, nine times out of ten they are feeling the same way. It was a humbling and very human experience learning that no matter how many places I’ve been or people I’ve met there is still so much to learn and feel about the new people you encounter everyday. It can be scary, but the mystery and excitement of who you are about to meet does not go away.
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Routine
Getting back into the campus groove is always easier said than done, and I was anticipating this adjustment since I got on the plane to come home to the U.S. I knew it was going to be rough and take me time to find my place back in the small world of John Carroll campus. I have been living back on campus for a little over a week now and what has been helping me adjust is simply listening to myself, and making time to make myself comfortable. The first week of school is always an overload, but instead of freaking out about making sure I had all of my textbooks on time, or who I was going to sit with at the Cafe, I replaced my anxious thoughts with simple coping skills that I knew would make my campus experience better for me. When I was feeling lonely or like I did not know where I belonged, I decorated my room and set the vibe with some music in my dorm to make it feel like a safe place I could belong and be okay with myself. When I was stressing out about time and how I was going to get everything done, I took a walk to map out where all my classes were. Doing this gave me perspective and mindful awareness of the places I’d pass everyday and where I would be at what time. This helped a lot to ground me back to earth and remember that I have the time and environment to accomplish everything that I needed to.
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Friends & changed friendships
I met so many new friends on my study abroad trip. I am so thankful for my new friends and created a lot of good relationships and dynamics with the small amount of people I was with everyday. Coming back to campus I realized I had made so many new friends but also had so many old friends back on campus that I had not stayed as close in touch with as I had hoped. It was very hard to try and find where I fit in with the people I would now be surrounded with in my day to day activities. There was a mix of new and old relationships that I had not thought about processing or evaluating before returning to campus. I learned that there are some people that you click with for life and it doesn’t matter where you’re at or how much time has passed, when you see them again time has not moved your heart. I also learned that friendships change alongside you as you change. People you used to pal around with everyday may not be in the same position or mindset as you remembered them once to be. And that’s okay, sometimes we outgrow each other, it’s what we humans do. Be thankful and aware of the growth taking place. Coming home from Abroad you bring back an abundance of friends home with you and into the picture. Feeling out the dynamics of everyday life in your new routine and lifestyle you start to find who is going to stick around and carry the friendship from abroad back to the U.S. Effort goes a long way with friendship, and those willing to put in the effort to have your company around are the ones worth investing in. I have learned that when friendships change it does not need to be taken personally or be a sad situation. Find relief in the fact that it’s okay to rekindle old friendships even if they aren’t the same or as comfortable. Accept the change and the new relationships that will bud out of your new adventure.