When I first started college, I woke up and did my makeup and hair for classes, walked there, and had a great time learning. Now, I wake up two minutes before my Zoom lecture and record it to not watch later. This not only is hurting my academic career; it is hurting me mentally because I know I am doing badly. I am exhausted from how hard this semester is.
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Do you feel like doing something so good and know it needs to be done but have no motivation to do it? That’s how I feel all of the time. A shower, classwork, socializing, getting up in the morning, cleaning my room, being active, going to work. All are a hassle anymore. A lot of it has to do with this stupid pandemic. I cannot tell you how hard this has been for me. I’m sure you can relate as a college student that this by far has been the hardest semester yet.
I think every day that I am going to get up at 7 a.m., go to class, get ready for the day, go for a walk, and get my work done. I end up waking up at 1 p.m. and staying in my PJs all day. On top of this my 21 st birthday is in four days. A five-letter word is ruining it though- COVID. My grandma will not see me, nobody wants to gather, nothing is open and you can’t sit in groups at places. This is what breaks my heart.
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The holidays are coming and this is my favorite time of year. I have lost so much because of this and now I feel like we may never get out of this and go back to normal. I don’t know how much more of the isolation I can take. The hard classwork from non-understanding professors. The nights by myself. The not taking care of myself because what’s the point. I’m still trying to figure out how but if I find the key I'll let you know. Until then I know I can get through this, it is just so, so hard.
