6 Lessons I learned From A Guy That Was All Talk
“This is the last time. I swear.”
“I didn’t mean to, I’m so sorry.”
“No I won’t, you are perfect to me.”
“I know I said I would change last time, but now I really mean it.”
“I will change eventually. I just know I will.”
“It’s your choice to believe I will change.”
We all know in today’s world relationships are hard, super hard. Relationships involve compromise, understanding, honesty, compassion, the desire to thrive…shall I go on? When one is in a relationship with someone you truly see yourself with in the future, you should be over the moon, contagiously happy. Though when that wonderful person fails to keep their promises, it begins to tire you out. Personally, I have a tendency to think they will change; therefore, making a fool out of myself. Here are 6 wonderful lessons I learned from those guys that were all talk.
1. I’m not stupid, I just see the best in everyone!
In other words, gullible. After relationships that have a bad ending, we tend to think that we are stupid and we should have seen this coming from a mile away. In reality, we are not stupid at all. We just believe that someone will change for us. That we will be enough for someone to man up. That we will be enough for someone to get their life together.
2. Your needs are not too much to handle!
Being shown off, being wanted to be called by your name and not some pronoun, wanted to be appreciated, and the desire to actually feel wanted and needed are not bad things. Those are things you should have in a relationship from day one. You shouldn’t have to beg for them at the beginning of the relationship.
3. Don’t say sorry for expecting him to grow up.
So many times I found myself explaining that things needed to change or I was leaving. I would address the problems, then he would say how I was perfect, he loved me, he was going to change, and then bring up endless excuses to make me feel bad for him. Guess who ended up saying sorry at the end of the conversation…me.
4. Forgiving too easily will screw you over in the end.
I let everyone walk all over me all the time. They do me wrong? It’s okay. You tell me the truth after lying to my face all week? Man, that sucks. It’s okay, let’s watch a movie. You never tell me I look nice? Oh, man that’s okay. Just please change. You messaged another girl after you said you wouldn’t? What a shame, hopefully you won’t do that again. Once you forgive the wrong doings of a person once, they will think you will continue to forgive them for the rest of their life. At the end of the relationship, when you finally can’t take it anymore, guess who will be to blame–you!
5. He will say “I love you” just to say it.
The big “L” word. It’s an important word, feeling and step in a relationship. It’s not a word to just throw around. Guys who are just talk in a relationship will just throw that word out there. What else to they have to lose? (Besides a wonderful girl who only wanted what was best for them.)
6. A guy that is all talk is more than likely full of themselves.
It’s the wonderful first red flag that so many girls, including myself, decide to toss to the side. They think they are the best. They can lift the most, they can get the most girls, they make the most money. Honestly hearing that all the time gets SUPER annoying. Listen, if a guy is full of himself and believes that he is God’s gift to women, you’re really going to think that he will change for you? Spoiler alert: He won’t. He’ll have you replaced within a few hours.
Relationships can be wonderful, but only when you find the right person. That person will respect you, make you feel like you are the only girl in the world, and make you feel truly loved. Don’t settle for anything less, girls! If his actions don’t line up with his words, kick him to the side! It will hurt, but you will be 100% better off!