Staying in a small space with another person can be challenging. Even if you haven’t had issues so far with your roommate, it is bound to happen eventually. It can be something small that builds into a mountain of little problems. Navigating your relationships with your roommate can be a challenge and a reward. Here are some tips and tricks to help foster an enjoyable environment with your roommate.
CommunicationÂ
The foundation of any relationship is communication! Set hours for both of your sleep schedules, study times, and social preferences. Talk with each other about what you both want to share and what is off-limits. A number one rule is to ask before using/borrowing if you do not know what’s off-limits.Â
Communicate using I statements, and express yourself. An example of this is that I feel overwhelmed when you have dirty dishes all over the dorm. Expressing yourself allows you both to feel better about your relationship. Misunderstandings and problems can build up; it is better to check in with your roommate once a week to make sure everything is resolved.
Have A Cleaning Routine
In a small space, dirt can build up fast. Set a routine for who does vacuuming, wiping surfaces, mops/Swiffers, taking out the trash, etc. One roommate should not be the dorm fairy; it should be both of you.Â
Respect Each Other’s Space
Having respect for one another is a great way to build your roomie relationship. If you are watching a video or listening to music, think about using headphones. When you are getting ready for the day, set aside 5 minutes to make your bed and clean up any dirty clothes on the floor! Your space is yours, and theirs is theirs. It’s always better for you to clean before the clutter goes onto the imaginary boundary of your roommate’s space.Â
Handle Issues Directly
Instead of ranting about your roommate to your other friends or family, talk with them instead. You should handle your issues with your roommate first. When speaking with each other, use respectful language and try to come to a solution.
Celebrate Together
Hang out together to build trust and friendship. Next time there is an event, go to it together. You can also decorate for the holidays together. Adding small decorations to your dorm creates cosiness and establishes a tiny home for both of you. Even getting coffee or food after an exam helps you relieve tension for a stressful day.
Know When To Ask For Help
If you cannot resolve the conflict or it escalates, speak with your residential advisor (RA) or residence life coordinator. Your RA can act as a mediator to help your relationship.
Your roommate is someone you live with for about 10 months, an academic year. You should build a trusting, respectful relationship with your roomie, even when you are at odds half the time. Share the laughs, embrace the oddities, and navigate the occasional disagreements; everything is part of the college adventure. After all, who else will understand your ranting in the middle of the night? Clear the clutter and have a shared space filled with friendship.