The only thing that is more time consuming and distracting to a college student than good grades and partying is simple: the phenomenon of Facebook. Being in college and not having a Facebook is like wearing white pants after Labor Day, an overall social faux pas. However, what was intended to be a site used prominently to communicate and talk to your friends is gradually becoming a tool that isolates us from the world outside of wall posts and newsfeeds.
In my Journalism class, we cover the hottest news stories of the week. Last Monday, the first story we covered was not Obama’s call for congress to cut taxes, but in fact the outrage of the newly updated Facebook. In a class of over 200 people, I have never heard more of an uproar than when this subject was brought to attention. For those of you who are not avid Facebook users like myself, the “new” Facebook is basically the same as the original – just with a different newsfeed structure. There were a slur of slanders being throwing around in class, but one that stood out to me in particular was; “I am totally deleting mine tonight.” Will that girl actually delete her Facebook? Probably not. But the real question to ask is why don’t we all just delete Facebook if we claim to hate it so much? The answer: we LOVE to hate on Facebook.
Nothing makes me laugh harder then the status’s that flood my news feed on a day that Facebook has made a modification. A laundry list of “I HATE THE NEW FACEBOOK!” are posted like they are going out of style, with – of course – 100 “likes” from all of their friends. It becomes cool to make fun of the annoying and inconvenient new changes, and many try to one-up their friends by making a wittier status than they did: “The only thing more annoying than the new Facebook, is everyone talking about it.”
The real underlying issue isn’t the new changes of Facebook; it is the fact that everyone cares so much. Facebook is a drug that most of us are guilty of taking.Â
The audience of Facebook can range from a college student leaving a funny video on their best friend’s wall to a grandparent looking at their grandchildren’s pictures. If you are a Facebook addict like myself, it may not be too late to get help. Here are some tips to decipher you from the casual user from those who should stop “checking in” unless it is to Facebook Rehab.
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1 .“TAG ME!” The first thing you say after ANY picture is taken. There is always that person – male/female – that you see jumping into pictures and making the owner of the camera reassure you that they will tag you. Of course we all want to see the pictures from the night before, but you shouldn’t be worrying about it on the dance floor of a party.
2. Muploads. Not sure who coined this term, but the “Mupload” also known as a “Mobile Upload” is a critical attribute to any Facebook addict. If 99-100% of the pictures you have taken on your cell are also on Facebook, you may want to retitle your mupload album to “Here is an album of my daily life that no one really cares about.” The truth isn’t pretty.
3. Checking in. Everyone goes to the movies, so why some feel the need to let people know about it via Facebook is a concept I will never grasp. Fine, you want to “Check In” to the Bahamas, but if you are checking in to go baby-sit your cousin, you may need to attend a few FA classes. (FA = Facebook Anonymous)
4. Facebook stalking. You know who you are.
5. Perfecting your profile. In less than 20 minutes you can write on your best friend’s wall, leave a video to your other friend, and comment on your Mom’s lame status. But the Facebook perfectionist will have NO record of such things. This is the person who hides all and any Facebook activity, appearing to be a casual Facebook user by anyone who visits their wall. It doesn’t stop there. The Facebook perfectionist also has the perfect 20 profile pictures that make them look amazing, only the best pictures tagged of themselves, and every post on their wall MUST be from a different friend. So if you haven’t started your homework yet, but you have changed your profile picture 30 times with no proof on your wall, you may fall into this category.
Facebook is clearly a significant part of the 21st century. While sometimes the changes can irritate us, it really only makes us more consumed with this growing pandemic. I am not saying stop using Facebook, I am saying stop complaining. The next time you feel the need to change your status to a dig at Mark Zuckerberg, remember that the reason you can even stall from writing your W131 Microtheme is because of him.
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