Your first serious relationship can feel very daunting at first. It’s adding a whole other person to your life and having to learn to adapt to that. You’re learning how to communicate, balance time with friends, and figure out how your partner wants to be loved, all while you’re most likely still trying to figure yourself out. Don’t get me wrong, for most, your first relationship is a wonderful experience, but there’s definitely a learning curve that people don’t discuss. So here’s my take on the ultimate survival guide to your first serious relationship.
Firstly, I think truly the most important thing you can do is not make them your entire world. The honeymoon phase can be so consuming- trust me, I know- but it’s so crucial you learn to keep up with your old routine. Prioritize balance, keep seeing your friends, and keep up with the hobbies you love. When you lose a sense of the things you loved before this person, it can be very daunting to see what you lost, whether you break up with this person or not. So it’s best to create that balance rather than canceling plans to go see your partner.
Then, I’d say learning how to communicate is also a major hurdle many must face in all relationships, let alone your first one. It can be very difficult opening up to people and explaining why something might upset you, or why you’re concerned about. But you can’t expect someone to read your mind, sadly. So learning how to communicate early on is what helps your relationship continue on, and in other future relationships as well. It provides you with a sense of confidence, rather than festering and holding in feelings.
Lastly, patience is another key aspect of this. You’re both probably very young and learning what each other likes/expects, so it’s a big learning curve. You’re not going to get everything right at first, and neither are they. For instance, your partner may express/want a different love language than you’re used to, and if it’s something that doesn’t cross your boundaries, you learn to adjust and care for that person in their ways. Same for what you’d want them to do for you. It can take a bit to learn these things, so it’s important to not get upset.
There is no one right way to approach your first relationship. Everyone has their own path, whether that be smooth or rocky. But it’s a learning process, and just remember to give not only yourself but your partner grace. These are just a few of the most important things I feel you should remember when going into your first relationship.