As an emotional, dramatic, main role in a romantic film wanna be, I have always thought about falling in love to be a huge ordeal. I would imagine flowers and chocolates and kissing in the rain. I thought for a long time that love meant the man I was destined to fall in love with would make my heart pound as I kissed him under the stars after a fancy and expensive dinner near a body of water. Recently, I have found that I am completely wrong about how I thought I would fall in love.
Movies and ads make love a huge ordeal and they put pressure on society to follow in their footsteps. Extravagance is the only way to someone’s heart. We are masked and are led to a pond that we shouldn’t be drinking from. Love is not what the media tells us. It is so much more than what it appears to be, but at the same time it is simple and small and that is the way it should be.
Why so small? I had to learn from experience that a little goes a long way. Once you get past dating and finding yourself and getting a good footing on what you want in life, finding love is a little simpler and makes it easier to ignore that cushion society throws at you. Sure, first dates are fun and of course, the next couple are right up there, but at the end of the day, if you want to take your relationship and your feelings for someone to the next level you have to let everything lovey-dovey fall away and focus on you and the person you want to love. Nothing else needs to come into play while making that decision.
There are feelings to be accounted for and actions to consider. Imagine a sweet summer romance of great dates and lust for one another and then a screeching halt of the great life when school comes around. Things will change! Change happens in all relationships and it doesn’t have to stay the same forever. In fact, it should change as you climb the ladder.
You can even replace the wondrous feeling of being cared for on a date with how you are introduced as a girlfriend or how you are referenced in conversation with people you may not know but your S/O wants to bring you in and tell their friends about your life. Or even just spending time with one another on the couch because you can. There doesn’t have to be pressure until you apply it yourself.
In the end, it’s the simple things that really matter. You should be wanting these simple, more raw times more than a planned romantic date. Sure, being with your S/O on a date and being surrounded by romance is wonderful and accepted, but love should come from the simple things. The simple things that make you and your partner work. Appreciate what you both bring to the table. Put down the romance goggles and pay attention to the things and experiences right in front of you. It’s so much more worth it in the end. Something simple will make your heart pound.
Shine Bright <3