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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

It’s okay to be in like when your S/O is in love

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Illinois State chapter.

     There are three little words that change everything in any relationship. I love you. To quote the band Snow Patrol “Those three words are said too much or not enough.” Depending on the situation, the relationship will shift with the first “I love you.” There are a lot of reasons to say I love you, but are the words seriously legit? Friends and family could say I love you but it doesn’t usually have the same impact as it would in a romantic relationship. In a romantic relationship, there are even more layers to why someone would say it. People may say “I love you,” to get their S/O to do something like have sex or buy them gifts.  Studies show that men are more likely to say “I love you,” because they want something. Saying I love you to someone is a big deal and should not be taken lightly. Those who misuse the word need to be educated. When in love you are ready to trust your S/O fully and put them first. You automatically want them to be happy and well and will see it through. 

     Being in love is different from loving someone. When you are loved you are appreciated and taken care of. When in love, you will still be appreciated and taken care of but with a romantic twist and a closer bond. In relationships, some move faster than their S/O to figure out how they feel. You can love someone without being in love and you can like someone when they are in love. Everyone has their own type of process when it comes to loving someone of being in love and that is okay! Just keep moving forward if you see a future with this person. Ask yourself, am I on my way to loving them? Make sure they know that you aren’t hanging them out to dry and that their “I love you” is still on the table and is still being thought of. 

     It’s awkward when someone tells you that they love you when you don’t love them back. You are “in like” still. What do you say in that situation? Sometimes nothing is the best thing to say. Give them a hug or kiss them. You will have to talk eventually, but this shows them that you care deeply about what was just said. You can say something like, “You make me so happy!” or “I appreciate you.” You can even get on their level and say “I am in love the thought of me being in love with you and you being in love with me.” Kindness will always help when someone puts their heart on the line. Understand that it’s scary to do so and know that you would be just as nervous telling your S/O that you are in love with them for the first time. Love is all around us and we must cherish it. Dig deep down to make sure you are ready to love with all of your heart and accept everything that makes them. Trust in yourself as well. Know that your sense of self and being is being acknowledged and loved. “I love you,” means a lot. You just have to say it to the right person at the right time. No pressure ;)

Mimi McNulty

Illinois State '20

Hey there! I'm Mimi McNulty. I'm 22 years old and I am a Public Relations major at Illinois State University. Writing has always been a passion of mine and I want to turn the world upside down by telling it like it is. If I were to give a TED Talk it would be about how to sustain a wild heart. Please keep reading my pieces to receive your daily dose of hilarity, security and as much knowledge that I have to share! I'm here to say we've all been there. Shine Bright