Drinking in college almost goes without saying — nearly everyone does it. Many students become out of control as they begin their collegiate journey with alcohol and while it’s (usually) funny to laugh about the night the next morning, is everyone else laughing with you or at you..?
Dear Jack,
What do guys think when a girl can and does drink a lot? Is it a turn off?
– Buzzed and Confused
College is a weird time in a lot of people’s lives. Ask any college graduate to tell stories from college and I am sure it will involve some sort of exaggerated ‘Project X’ party that they threw in their basement with 400 people (no matter how fun you make that party seem, graduate, I am sure you can divide the amount of kegs/people you say were there by 4 and have an accurate representation of reality). Nevertheless there is one common factor in each of their favorite stories… Alcohol. No matter how much my mother can lecture me on why I don’t need to pound shots on a Saturday afternoon at tailgate, I cannot deny that it is part of life here. It drives social life on campus and for most people leads to really happy and successful relationships. Unfortunately, I see a double-standard when it comes to the question asked to me about what I think about girls drinking. Why should it be any different for a girl than a guy..? I hate that. Ali wrote from a girl’s perspective what she thinks about guys drinking below.
Now that we are on the topic let’s get into it. Science says that girls need to drink a lot less for the effects of alcohol to become apparent. That is something that we cannot control as a culture and we are all responsible for recognizing that fact. We have all been to a party where the girl is standing on the counter with a fifth in one hand screaming “Wrecking Ball” while Party in the USA is playing. Now she may be having a blast and I am all for that, but chances are she is entirely too intoxicated to still be drinking. I would venture to guess most guys would not be turned on by that. Please someone find a guy that gets turned on when Snooki is “Jersey Turn-piking” on a bar… (Yeah I made that a verb). To me that is crossing the line.
To me, guys and girls alike are fully capable of having a good time without getting this drunk. Moderation is key in this instance. Guys are looking for a girl at a party who will be a good time but not someone who you need to take care of 15 minutes later. We are all adults at this point in our lives (maybe), and we need to be able to control ourselves. I think that a girl who can ask me to “cut her off” when she’s had enough is a lot more attractive than a girl who keeps pounding drinks until I have to carry her home. The girl that can put her trust in me to take care of her before she needs to be taken care of is a lot more attractive and a turn-on rather than the opposite.
When it comes down to it, drinking is going to happen in college. We all have figured out our limits at this point and whether a guy or girl we need to be responsible and have some sort of respect for ourselves. Sloppy isn’t attractive, but responsible and fun is. Find that happy medium and have a good time next weekend!
Changing perspectives: What do girls think if a guy can drink a lot? Is it a turn off?
Here’s an interesting topic for many reasons but mainly because, I think, for most girls it swings both ways. And also because I’m the World’s Worst Drinker, so I’m sure it’ll be embarrassing to hear Jack’s opinion.
There are many types of drinking habits found in guys and, unfortunately from what I’ve seen, most of them are not good. Moderation is key here fellas, don’t over-do it and don’t under-do it. We can all agree there is nothing worse than being That Guy, the drunkest person at the party acting like a total fool. That Guy can likely be found slamming shots, or in worst case scenario be carrying around his “personal fifth” for the night. As in he drinks an entire bottle to himself. You can also find That Guy unknowingly spitting while talking and hanging on girls who likely have terror in their eyes and are waiting for any moment to escape his presence. This guy may be an extreme, but I’ve seen it too many times. MEN: If you’re looking to talk to any girls on a night out of drinking, do not be this guy. Maybe this guy will hook-up with a girl, but she will likely be his equivalent — an out-of-control girl just as blacked out as he is. And what’s worse than waking up next to a stranger the next morning? Not even remembering meeting this mystery person the night before.
But on the other hand, it’s strange when boys are at a party where everyone is drinking and having a good time, and they aren’t. I mean maybe some would call it peer pressure, but I just figure why do you want to be around a bunch of drunk people… if you’re not drunk? It gives me the impression that you’re a couple of things:
1. Boring. Do you not like to have fun?
2. Judgmental. Are you judging all of us because we like to binge drink and dance in dark rooms with strangers?
3. Saint Purity Ring. An overall mix of boring and judgmental.
4. A cop. Or maybe a German spy…
Okay, so the cop and spy option was a joke, but really, even if you’re not a big drinker I would suggest sipping on a beer or making a “mixed drink” and casually forgetting to add the vodka. No one will know. The point I’m trying to make here is that you don’t want to be the oddball, the buzzkill, the person everyone’s like ‘why is that guy not drinking?’ Because even though I may be the only one to admit it, many of us will think that about you because you’re the only one not drinking. Moderation and deception are key. Figure them both out because (most) girls love mysteries and a fellow named Casanova.
To wrap it up: A guy who can withstand 20 shots in a night only has me asking myself one question, how is this guy not in the hospital? Girls don’t want to hang out with someone who won’t remember who they are until the 3rd time you’ve met. Don’t get so drunk that you can’t remember who you are or what you’re saying. Drink enough liquid courage so that you’re feeling smooth… but not enough to make you slur. To key is to find your Goldilock place while drinking where it’s not too hot (That Guy), not too cold (Sober Sally), it’s just right (Ricco Suave, Ryan Gosling, James Franco [my personal fav…] or whoever has you channeling your inner Sex God) and you’re good to go, boys.
Do you have a question you’d like to ask Jack? Fill out this anonymous survey and your question may be answered in next week’s column.