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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

5 Tips that Everyone in a Long-Distance Relationship NEEDS to Hear

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Illinois State chapter.

Everyone knows long-distance is hard. While you see other couples going on dates, holding hands and kissing, among a variety of other things, you have to opt for phone calls, FaceTime or Skype.

Even though you know you won’t ever give up on your significant other, sometimes you’re sad and just can’t help it. For those times, when the distance, no matter how big or small, of your relationship has got you in the blues, here are five tips to try to make you a little less sad.

Limit texting throughout the day for meaningful conversation

I know, I know… don’t text them? But all you want to do is talk to them. Trust me, I do too. What I mean is to try to avoid texting them every second of every minute, of every hour, of every day. If you text 24/7, what will there be to talk about when you call them, FaceTime them, or see them? The point is to text just enough throughout the day to stay in contact because this will allow for meaningful conversation elsewhere.

Keep them in the loop

Although I just advised you to lay off heavy texting, I do think it is important to keep them in the loop. If your significant other is not aware of things going on in your life, they can start to feel like they are not even a part of your life and vice versa. And being a part of the other’s life is what relationships are all about.

Reassure, reassure, reassure

Being apart means losing the simple things: hand-holding, hugs, kisses, cuddles while watching Netflix, date nights, and simply being in their presence. This loss could be quite discouraging, and so it is important to do what you can to make up for it: tell them. Things like telling them you love them every day, how important they are to you, how much you miss them, and so on, are needed to feel grounded in a relationship where a lot is lost.

Always know when you’re going to see each other next

The best thing about long-distance relationships is the moment when you finally get to see your significant other and jump in their arms. When seeing them is what is getting you through the week apart, month apart, the year apart, or even longer, it is important to always have that to look forward to. Planning when you two will see each other next, not only gives you excitement, but it makes it easier to leave them, knowing that in due time you will be back together making more memories.

Don’t let other people get into your head

When it comes to long-distance, people are always there telling you it will not work, or that you are not fully experiencing whatever chapter of your life you are in because of it. Don’t let these people and words get into your head. If you truly love your significant other, and they love you, and you are both happy, that is all that matters. You both know that what you are doing is worth it, and some snide comments will not be what is going to bring it down.

In short:

Long-distance relationships suck. There are going to be ups and downs, days where you miss them so much you cannot focus on anything else, days where you wish so hard that they were with you instead of miles away. But no matter how hard it gets, you are in it together, and you both have the job to hold the other up. So next time either of you are taking this long-distance thing kind of hard, maybe try using some of these tips, they may work for you as they do for me.

Alexa Fricilone

Illinois State '23

Alexa is a recent journalism graduate of Illinois State University and current student at NYU's Summer Publishing Institute. She has been a contributing writer since 2021 and our Junior Editor since 2022. Follow her on Instagram @alexafricilone