I often hear people say that political opinions in a friendship do not matter. So, if you for example vote for different parties you should be able to put that aside and still be friends. In my opinion, whether you are able to do that definitely depends on the kinds of people you are. If neither of you is really that interested in politics, then maybe. But then again, politics is so important in every single person’s life. Politics ponders questions that are at the core of our identities and rights and even if you aren’t that interested in them, you probably should be. Or if you are able to ignore politics altogether, you are probably in a privileged position and should recognize that.
To me, politics is a crucial part of every portion of my life, including friendships. As a queer woman, I am especially interested in political decisions that have to do with my rights, though I also try to be the best possible ally to for example the black, transgender and disability communities and take their rights into consideration when choosing who to vote for. Politics is of course not only who you vote for but also what opinions you hold and how you act. Who you vote for just makes those opinions visible and has a very concrete impact. That is why I like to be aware of who my friends vote for or at least which party, though not wanting to say that is also valid and then I just make my assessment in a different way.
We have a party in Finland called The Finns. They are very critical of gay marriage and trans rights and don’t want Finland to help refugess. Many of their politicians are known to be quite racist. This is the party I like the least of any major Finnish parties. If a friend of mine told me they vote for The Finns, I would most definitely be wary. Yes, voting for the Finns is an opinion they are entitled to but that probably means they contribute to the human rights of many marginalized groups being violated. That is, in my opinion, a very big deal and not okay. Many supporters of The Finns are somewhat homophobic which affects my life directly. And even if this friend in question wasn’t, in order to vote for The Finns they would at least have to be critical of refugee rights or trans rights or the rights of some other marginalized groups I’m trying to help and be allies with. To me, being friends with a person like that who contributes to the oppression of these groups in even a minor way seems quite impossible.
Another party I dislike is The National Coalition Party (NCP). They focus more on economics stuff and are generally a party for people on the right economically. This means they support companies and businesspeople as well as private ownership. I dislike them because I believe capitalism the way it is now will lead to us all dying because it accelerates climate change. Companies try to make profit without caring for the environment and that just isn’t sustainable in any way. I have a few friends who support NCP and I’m generally more willing to be friends with NCP supporters than The Finns supporters. However, I will most definitely ask them to explain why they support NCP and how they expect to survive climate change with NCP in charge. If I believe them to be kind and compassionate people despite supporting NCP, I might let it slide.
In general, I try not to judge anyone based only on what party they support but rather why they support that party. It is always good to have a proper conversation with someone before judging them. However, I do find it hard to see myself becoming friends with for example a supporter of The Finns. If someone doesn’t support my human rights, or someone else’s for that matter, I just can’t ignore that. Some of you probably think that this makes me a horrible person but I have also cut ties with old friends when their political identity has developed into something totally opposite from mine.
Now, I definitely won’t judge you if you have friends regardless of political background. Good for you for being open-minded. But I also ask you not to judge people to whom politics is of utmost importance in a friendship and I hope you understand us a little better now.