Disclaimer: If someone physically assaults you (this includes muggings, violent robberies, sexual assault, domestic violence etc), it’s never your fault. Not ever. No matter what you did. As long as we’re talking about assault instead of self-defense, the perpetrator always bears 100% of the blame.
Now, let me first offer a warm welcome to all the new students and welcome back to returning students! In this article, we will examine some of the most common violent scenarios an average collegiette might encounter in her everyday life and how to maximize the chances of survival while minimizing the risks. I recommend reading Part 1 first because in this part, I will discuss some of the concepts and methods covered in the previous part.
The first thing we need to do is understand what exactly could harm us out there so we can figure out how to prepare for dangerous situations. While statistics rarely tell the whole truth, here they will provide pertinent information that will allow us to make appropriate and reasonable risk assessments. These are the official stats from Statistics Finland (Tilastokeskus), highlighting the numbers of various violent crimes between years 2014 and 2015: There were 96 instances of homicide in 2015, five cases less than in 2014. Almost half of them, 43%, were committed within private residences. There were also 299 instances of attempted homicides in 2015, 28 cases less than in 2014. When it comes to rape, there were 1052 instances in 2015 and of those 18.7% were committed in public areas. We saw a 4.3% increase from 2014, and of those rapes, 13.3% were committed in public areas, another number that has gone up. What we need to take away from those numbers is that rapes committed by strangers in public areas are on the rise, a concerning development considering they used to be relatively rare. If we look at the average annual number of rapes per year (approximately 880) between 2009-2015, we can observe a mostly steady increase. Furthermore, in the past 6 years, the number of reported rapes as well as attempted rapes has increased an astounding 87% (in 2009, the police received 503 reports in total). It is also noteworthy that 45.6% of all sexual harassment happens in public areas.
If we look at all violent assaults, 33 900 were committed in 2015 (a little under 1000 cases or 2.9% more than in 2014) and of those, 39% were committed within private residences. According to statistics, men are the most common victims of violence when it comes to all other kinds except sexual violence. Women were victimized more often in crimes related to sexual violence such as rape and sexual harassment.
The numbers are bleak, yes, but it’s not all doom and gloom. The statistics should be used to form rational estimates of the risks involved in the various social situations we encounter in our daily lives.The good thing is, we can manipulate our odds of avoiding trouble simply by making educated decisions. For example, if anyone approaches you on a busy street in the light of day, there’s a high likelihood nothing bad will happen. If a car with four rowdy young men inside follows you when you’re walking home alone, drunk, and in the dark, the car stops next to you, and the passengers ask you to join them, the risk to your safety increases drastically. Makes sense, right?
This sounds like profiling, however, doesn’t it? But is it always a bad thing? Not really; if you don’t take it to absurd levels, like that of e.g. racists, then profiling is merely something every last one of us does every day. We all profile each other and especially strangers the moment we see them. We make assumptions and draw conclusions based on what we observe; words, tone of voice, actions, clothing choices, age, height, weight, even body composition etc. That’s a natural part of how we, as humans, observe our surroundings, so there’s no reason to view all profiling as inherently negative because profiling is what allows us to avoid most confrontations and mishaps. For instance, if there’s a thunderstorm raging outside, you might want to reconsider going outside carrying a steel pole.
The regrettable bottom line is that anyone and everyone is a potential assailant because that’s the truth: we simply cannot know what the person approaching us is planning to do, be they young, old, female, male, intoxicated, sober, or whatever. Maybe they want to ask for the time or punch our teeth in. Who knows? Nobody does unless they’re clairvoyant or can see the future.
Should we be in constant fear, then? Never go to parties, pubs, or clubs? Never go on dates? That’d be crazy, right? And that’d be correct; there is absolutely no reason to stop enjoying your life, going to parties, dating, even having one-nighters etc. The above information and violent crime statistics are intended to help you make educated risk assessments. If you are aware of the risks, you can assess the situation and make a decision: is your object of consideration worth the risk or not?
Pretty much everything is a calculated risk. For instance, plenty of people have choked to death after accidentally inhaling their chewing gum, but the number of such incidences is so low, you know you can chew your gum safely enough to go ahead and give those jaws a good workout. Usually discussing this subject prompts the most common response: ”I’ve left bars with complete strangers dead drunk and gone to their apartments for the night plenty of times and nothing bad has ever happened, so all of the above is bogus.” The problem with that mentality is that it denies the reality: everything we do contains some inherent risks. Even just staying at home every day is a risk. Most accidents happen at home, after all. Most of the time the risks are negligible, but there are activities with a higher risk of harm, and the main point of this article is to make people aware of these risks. After all, whether you take the risk or don’t has absolutely nothing to do with your awareness of the risks inherent in whatever activity you are considering.
That being said, I’d also advise you to listen to your instincts. There are subtle cues violent people often display right before an assault, but even if you don’t know them, most people are able to pick up enough to sense that something is going to go wrong if they can’t leave or de-escalate the situation soon.
Some of these cues include but are not limited to:
-
glancing over the shoulder repeatedly (to make sure there are no witnesses)
-
repeatedly squeezing hands into fists
-
switching to mainly one syllable words like ”so?” and ”yeah?”
-
shifting weight from one foot to the other
-
squaring the shoulders (an attempt to look bigger and hence more intimidating)
Keep in mind that this is the tiniest tip of a massive iceberg. Entire books have been written about this topic, such as Geoff Thompson’s Dead or Alive: The Choice is Yours. I understand this can be an unpleasant subject, but I strongly believe that it’s better to learn about this stuff, carefully consider the information, accept the sad fact that there are bad people out there who don’t care one bit what they’re doing is wrong, and find a way to accept that without turning into a paranoid wreck who jumps at their own shadow. Yes, it’s uncomfortable, yes, it’s scary, but learning to live with this knowledge is a hell of a lot better than the alternative; willful ignorance that could, in the worst case scenario, lead to serious harm.
There’s no need to lock yourself in a bunker; if you get a good feeling about the guy or girl inviting you over for the night or whatever, consider the risks, listen to your gut, and make the call. Most of all, enjoy the beginning of the semester, live your life, and stay safe.
Sources: