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Do you feel alone? Does loneliness linger even when you’re out with friends? Feel isolated from everybody? This article is for all my lonely sisters.
We can be surrounded by so many people but feel so lonely still. Whether we’re at a party, hanging with friends, or just having a one on one with someone. We try so hard to find something to fill that loneliness with temporary lovers, shallow conversations, or people who hold no importance to us. We constantly try to fill the void with more people only to realize that other people can’t fill this void.
Self-love is focused on YOURSELF. Only YOU can fill the void people can’t fill. I know that’s such a no brainer, but my needy-ass didn’t realize this shit till AFTER my breakup. It is extremely hard to find happiness in your company because we don’t take notice of the moments we do find happiness in ourselves. A lot of these moments are small, they can comprise of things like—watching a youtube video, practicing makeup, running, reading, moments of just you doing you.
With that being said, let’s get to the tools on how to work through loneliness and achieve self-enjoyment (not masturbation but it can be if you want it to be).
- Turn your Distractions into Hobbies!
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I would consider this a cliché for sure, but it works! Find something that keeps you engaged and focused. Turn to either painting, yoga, video games, reading, anything that keeps you engaged. A lot of the times when we’re alone we drift off into the deep seas of loneliness, which is extremely difficult to get out of. Find something that will keep you occupied until the feelings pass.
- Accomplish Something!
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This accomplishment doesn’t have to be big at all! Any small wins should be celebrated like a big win! Whether your small achievements are baking some bomb ass bread, running a mile in 5 minutes, or simply cleaning your room appreciate yourself for it. Appreciate yourself, be kind to yourself, negativity only enforces negative vibes and we ain’t about that.
- Reconnect
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I know I started this article explaining how even being with people doesn’t help loneliness, but I swear this is different from that. Reviving old friendships isn’t necessarily easy but if it does work out its amazing! It’s like having a new person to talk to without the awkward introductions.
These are the tools that helped me when I would get stuck with loneliness. Sadly, there will be times where it’ll just stick with you and in those cases, you will have to just feel them out. Loneliness is not something we should feel uncomfortable or scared of, it should be something accepted and even welcomed. When you are hit with these waves of sadness you should practice with feeling it, understanding it, and accepting it so it can pass. Take the feeling of loneliness as a personal moment for yourself to reflect and appreciate yourself.
During this self-love journey, the most important thing is to be kind to yourself.