It wasn’t until college that I realized how afraid of rejection I really was. Looking back on the past two years, there were many opportunities that were presented to me, but I did not take advantage because I was afraid of the word “no.” Before coming to college I was pretty confident. I was a cheerleader (the captain my senior year), a student council officer on the executive board, and the daughter of the head coach for football and basketball. I would say pretty much everyone knew who I was. If they didn’t know me, they knew of me. With that being said, the transition from high school to college wasn’t hard but it wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be either.
Many people come to an HBCU because they want to be surrounded by people like themselves. Intelligent, talented, creative, and not to forget, Black. I came for that same reason. However, it can be a little intimidating at times. We all know that we as black people have to work twice as hard to get half as far as our peers who are not of color. Consequently, that makes us driven and passionate about our fields of study. And ultimately it seems like we’re in competition with each other. Everyone wants that spot in the organization, everyone wants that internship, everyone wants a chance to showcase the talents they possess. Once you come to college, any college, you realize you are no longer the smartest one in the room. You definitely have a humbling moment in realizing there is always someone out there better than you at something.
This semester is intern application season, and I was going crazy with applying. As many internships that I applied to I thought I would get at least one yes. Butttt it didn’t work out that way. I received plenty of emails that read “thank you for your interest” or “although we were impressed by your application…” It was a little discouraging, not going to lie. Especially since I have to have an internship in order to graduate, and after this summer I only have one more summer to secure the bag. But I had to come to the realization that I have to keep applying myself. I had to remember that what is meant for me, will always be for me.
https://www.masterfile.com/search/en/frustrated+african+american
In the meantime, I applied for other things within my institution that I didn’t think I was qualified for. I took a leap of faith and ignored the voice in my head that said that I didn’t have what it took to land a position in that organization, job, or internship. I became determined to prove that voice in my head wrong. From having that determination I managed to not only be offered a spot in the organization, but secured an internship as well.
I say all of this to say that rejection is sometimes necessary. In the end you probably weren’t meant to get that offer because somewhere down the line there is a better opportunity catered just to you. Also, just because it’s a no the first time doesn’t mean it will be a no the second or third. The key is applying yourself, realizing that you have what it takes, and ignoring the voice in your head keeping you from being the best you you can be.