It’s cuffing season! During this time many singles are often searching for someone to settle down with for the upcoming season. Many choose to participate in this trend while others decide to go the traditional route of dating. In general, when it comes to dating we look for admirable qualities when looking for a significant other. Everyone has significant characteristics they admire in a significant other whether that be vulnerability, confidence, or a sense of humor. The world of dating can drastically differ based on our previous experiences or expectations. This can mean dating can come easily for some and more difficult for others. So in honor of the season, I decided to interview three single women on what they are looking for in a significant other and how this has applied to their dating experience while attending college!
Amera, 20
In 1 Corinthians, chapter 13, verses 4-7, it reads, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
Finding a significant other can be challenging, especially one with all of those aforementioned traits. These are traits that everyone can agree they wish to have in a partner, though the order of their importance varies from person to person. Personally, the first thing I look for in a significant other is their relationship with God, whom I believe makes it possible for them to be kind, generous, and forgiving. If the relationship is not centered around God, then I doubt that it will last.
Next, I look at their ability to lead. As a young woman, I am appreciative of a man who can be firm and communicate clearly. It is an attractive trait that indicates a level of stability, protection, and comfort. It allows for a deeper level of trust and respect in the long term and is often accompanied by a patient demeanor.
Finally, I look at their personality. I value a man with a loving and warm personality. This has to do with a man’s character and is not something that can be faked easily, if at all. A man who is willing to take their time with me, day by day, with persevering kindness is extremely valuable in a modern relationship. As people become more casual and cynical about their relationships and statuses, a man who is willing to honor you as a human being is a welcome gift from God, and I hope that every woman hoping to find someone like that does despite many examples of the contrary.
Overall, finding true love and a significant other can be hard but, with intentional dating, I believe everyone at Hampton University can find their significant other.
Naomi, 20
In a significant other, the first thing that I tend to be attracted to are guys who are authentically themselves. At this stage in my early adult life, my ideal boyfriend would be someone who gives me reassurance, is open, trustworthy, consistent, and a person that I would not be afraid to be completely vulnerable with. I want us to be able to help each other grow as individuals. I would say that dating life at Hampton has been a complete nightmare riddled with guys who are inconsistent and lack basic communication skills as well as emotional intelligence. As someone who considers herself to be very emotionally intuned, it’s so exhausting to talk to guys who are emotionally unavailable.
Madison, 19
What I am looking for in a future significant other is someone who is unapologetically themself. Someone who is able to advocate for what they believe in as well as stand up for others. I also want my partner to be genuine, trustworthy, and loyal. It is also nice to have a sense of humor and is a great communicator! I envision my significant other as someone I can be vulnerable with, and who is not afraid to be vulnerable with me. I want someone to grow with as we work towards our futures. While at Hampton, it has been hard to meet someone who I truly see as a potential partner. Many of the guys at Hampton are not emotionally available and/or just want to play around. It can be hard to find someone here that is there for the right reasons. I know at times I want to have fun, but it would be nice to truly find someone that I can see myself spending the rest of my life with!
While we often try to find people who can fit our criteria, it’s important to remember that no one is perfect. Many times we often find ourselves drawn to people who meet few of our criteria or are the complete opposite. During this season be open to meeting new people, but also be wary of red flags. Whether you decide to join in on cuffing season, it’s always important to treat everyone with respect and be genuine with your intentions. The world of dating can be complicated and tricky, so remember to enter with an open mind and heart. So I ask you, what are YOU looking for in a significant other and how has your search been?