If you’ve ever found yourself explaining feminism to a man then you’ve also probably heard a man explain why he thinks he fits into that description. He may utter things like, “Of course I’m a feminist, I love women,” as if that’s the criteria. In the midst of International Women’s Month, it’s important to note the difference between being a feminist and simply being attracted to divine feminine energy. The problem is not that men want to be feminists. The problem is that they believe that they are feminists while simultaneously taking part in or supporting anti-feminist behavior/language — all while using toxic masculinity to justify their ways.
If you’re a feminist, you are: body positive, anti-rape, anti-sexually violent behavior, anti-victim blaming, anti-double standards, and so much more. Too often do these social aspects of feminism fall through the cracks of a man’s loose definition of the term. A guy who isn’t fully conscious of the weight of the word and all its aspects cannot wave the banner of feminism.
Women, keep an eye out for these red flags like men who only encourage body positivity in relation to “fit” women in bikinis, who think a woman’s body count matters but theirs doesn’t, or men who consider a woman’s outfit relevant to “why” she was sexually assaulted.
Men, don’t fall into the category of “feminists” who believe with their words but not their actions – the “feminists” who don’t advocate, who don’t question and evaluate the behaviors of themselves and their peers, and who believe being that a feminist can mean whatever they want.