This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Hampton U chapter.
Being in college is difficult itself, but what about the extra heartache from being so far away from bae? Many people enter college with a boyfriend, their high school sweetheart, or maybe even met someone in college who they really like but goes to a totally different university. Who’s to say that college and distance has to come between the relationship? But there’s a solution to all of that! Here me out, there may be some solutions to dealing with long distance but not all relationships will work out. That’s just how life is, but there are ways to prevent it as long as both individuals are willing to put in the time and effort!
Communication:
- Take turns texting, calling and face-timing each other so one doesn’t feel like he/she always has to reach out to you first. Remember, you both have to put in the effort.
- You don’t have to talk 24/7 but you must talk to one another at least once a day. Never go a day without talking. If you’re going to be busy let your significant other know so he/she is not sitting around wondering where you’ve been.
- If you guys don’t have time to talk during the day, have a FaceTime Sleepover! FaceTime sleepovers are great because it gives you the illusion that you’re actually sleeping with the person and you get to wake up and see them in the morning.
Intimacy:
You may be far away from your partner but you can still keep the sexual momentum going. Where there’s a will, there’s a way!
- Talk about what you miss about your partner and what you want to do with them the next time you see them. This will keep him/her on their toes and just excited with anticipation.
- Send photos! Not nudes necessarily, but if that’s your preference go right ahead. Photos of yourself with cute captions saying you miss them or just letting them know what you’re up to for the day shows your partner that they are on your mind.
- Send random SnapChats that they can watch so they can see you instead of just texting.
- Facetime sex! This may be extreme for some but if you are very comfortable with your significant other this can keep your relationship spicy! FaceTime sex is whatever you make it, whether you’re showing each other your body parts or masturbating on camera with one another.
When Facing Conflicts:
When dealing with long distance there may be some moments or times when you and your significant other are not on the same page which can result into an argument or disagreement. Try to keep those to a minimum as much as possible!
- Both of you guys may be hours, miles or even states apart, deter away from keeping a conflict lingering.
- Never intentionally cause conflict or try to hurt your partner by doing something purposely or bringing up something they did in the past that has already been addressed. Keeping score will always cause issues.
- Communication is key! And if you both slip into the realm of “I’m not talking to him unless he hits me up first” or “I’m mad at him so I’m not talking to him” this leaves space for you guys to grow apart if this carries on for too long.
- Compromise! You can’t win every battle; so let your partner win certain fights sometimes (if it’s not really that serious), but also stand your ground as well in some situations. You don’t want to be a pushover or weak!
Travel:
- Make time to go and visit your partner as many times as you can throughout the year! This also helps keeps things interesting because you both will be anticipating on seeing each other.
- Countdown! When you finally know when the next time you and your significant other will see each other, start a countdown so you guys are both just as excited for the day when you guys will be reunited.
- Not everyone may have the means to travel, but save up! Make the effort! And when you do see them, make those times worth your while!
- Take trips with each other! If Spring break or the Summer time is one of the only times you guys are free, make arrangements and plan a nice vacation with each other (and friends) or Netflix and chill with each other as much as possible!
Trust Issues:
- We all wonder what our partner is doing when we’re not around, whether if they’re with another girl/boy, falling for someone else or even cheating! But don’t always jump to conclusions ladies and gentleman; feel out the situation before you attack your partner about your suspicions.
- Trust is something that should be established in the beginning of the relationship, first and foremost! Without trust, you both will drive yourselves insane worrying about what your partner is doing when they’re away.
- Having trust issues can definitely hinder your relationship greatly. If one partner trusts their significant other more than the other, he/she can feel like no matter what they say or do you won’t believe or trust them.
- Definitely build a strong wall of trust with one another; this is one of the key foundations to any healthy relationship because what’s love without trust?
Personal Time:
- Although you may love your significant other to death, don’t forget about yourself! If we lose ourselves loving someone else that’s also no bueno! So always incorporate some “Me Time” into your schedule.
- Keep yourself active and occupied with different activities, clubs and just being with your friends. This will help distract you from the heartache of missing your partner and keep you an active, happy individual.
- Instead of focusing on how much you want to share every moment with your partner, appreciate the personal time you have while the two of you are apart.
- Make sure to go out and hang out with your friends still, we all have that one friend that falls in love and all of a sudden does everything with her boyfriend instead of being with her friends. Have a balance! If that relationship fails, the only people who will be there to catch you when you fall are your friends. Appreciate them!