Spoiler Alert: It is Exhausting…
Wednesday, we watched America fail Breonna Taylor as Kentucky Attorney General, Daniel Cameron, announced that the officers who killed Breonna Taylor were justified for their actions, indicting only one of the three, for firing shots into the neighboring apartments. Still in emotional distress on Friday, we watched the same black men who have tweeted protect black women on Twitter, question Megan Thee Stallion’s trauma as Tory Lanez released a “tone-deaf” album, denying the entire incident after Megan already confirmed it was true. Living as a black woman in 2020 is like being on a rollercoaster that never ends. One minute, we are sharing the pure joy it feels to be a black woman with hashtags like; #blackgirlmagic #blackgirlsarewinning, and #period. The next minute, we are having to convince the world that we too are worthy of respect and recognition. To be a Black woman right now is to think we are finally rising in a world that never cared enough to embrace and see us in all that we are, while also being constantly reminded that we are the only ones holding each other up in this world. To be a black woman right now is… exhausting.
Don’t get it confused- being a black woman is not something I or many would trade for the world. We are the trendsetters, blueprint, and culture creators of this society. However, it seems as though it is never too long before we as a community of women are knocked off our high horses and brought back down to the reality we live in this society. Made to believe we are finally being recognized and seen by the world when in fact, we are still as Malcolm X described in 1962, disrespected, neglected, and unprotected.
We are living in a confusing time where we are forced to celebrate our wins in the midst of mourning our losses. Just recently, Zendaya made history at the Emmys becoming the youngest to win Outstanding Lead Actress. Feeling like she just made a win for the black women everywhere, we couldn’t even fully celebrate that moment after hearing the news that Breonna Taylor did not receive justice as a grand jury failed to charge any of the three officers for causing Breonna Taylor’s death on Wednesday. This comes more than six months after she was shot and killed in her apartment, and after months of memes, tweets, magazine covers, and laws.
To hear this news, was like a slap in the face to many. That decision by that grand jury confirmed that America does not value the lives of black women, something we’ve known for a while. The sad reality is that America likes to pick and choose when they value us.
“For as long as I live, I’ll think about Breonna Taylor and Oluwatoyin Salau. How this country fails black women. How no matter how many shirts and magazine covers they stick you on, your life isn’t meaningful unless it’s profitable. They deserved much more than this.” @br0wnsga on Twitter.
Not even less than 72 hours later, Rapper Tory Lanez shares on social media that he “got time today…9 PM PST,” referring to the incident in July when he shot Megan Thee Stallion. Later on that night, he proceeded to release an album, profiting off of Megan’s trauma, where he dissed multiple black women and denied shooting Meg after she already confirmed on Instagram Live in tears, and with an Instagram photo of her wounds weeks before. With many black women choosing to not to give the male artist any of their attention or time, others had second thoughts.
“Megan Thee Stallion got some explaining to do.” @theconciousless on Twitter.
“Imagine if Tory Lanez dropped a who shot ya diss track (multiple laughing emojis).” @freebandnick on Twitter.
These were just a few of the tweets coming from the same black men who were tweeting justice for Breonna Taylor and protect black women weeks before. Why is it that we can’t just believe Black women when they say it? It is heartbreaking to see how Black women’s pain and trauma is turned into comedy by the same ones we ride so hard for on every occasion.
We as black women have no supporters but support everyone. Our trauma and feelings are not taken seriously or respected. We are constantly misunderstood, and tired of having to explain ourselves to the world who doesn’t even care to listen. All we ask is for respect. Show up for us. Defend us. Be there for us. Love on us. Believe us, and respect us. All of us, and all the time. In real life, not just when you pick and choose.