Purple flowers with in the Blue Garden; Photo by Phoebe McGowan.
Valentine’s Day has been marketed as a holiday for only those who have someone extra special to spend an over the top romantic day with. But who says you can’t be your own valentine, all the time? Though I am in a relationship, I know that I am mine before I am anyone else’s. I cannot rely on one person to give me all the love I need, and I take my self care and love very seriously. To me, there is nothing more important! While this holiday does remind us of how beautiful and essential love is, it shouldn’t be the only time you practice self love. Self care is the foundation for a healthy and happy life, so don’t just save it for Valentine’s Day! Here’s some things you can do all year to feel good!
1. Take yourself on a date. I love going places alone; it gives me the freedom to do exactly what I want, exactly how I want to! Go to the park and linger underneath the clouds for an hour or so. See the movie you’re dying to go to without having to share your popcorn. Enjoy the peace yourself brings.
2. Learn something new. Make an effort to do something you’ve always wanted to! Whether it’s taking up guitar, cooking, dancing… Feel yourself grow and fall in love with your new abilities! Just remember not to take yourself too seriously, it’s all a learning experience.
3. Skip class or work (and don’t feel bad about it). Your mental health is more important than anything else, so if you really need more sleep, time to yourself or a good cry, skip your obligations! Try not to make this a habit, but at times it is necessary, even if you’re not technically “sick.”
4. Take time for yourself in the morning. Don’t immediately check your phone— connect with yourself instead. Getting up even 10 minutes earlier can give you time to stretch, meditate or make breakfast. Starting your day off by taking care of yourself will start your day off on a lovely foot. You’ll be more relaxed and clear headed all day!
5. Say no to what is not worth your time. Your time is invaluable, and learning to say no can set you free from unnecessary obligations others put on you, or that you put on yourself. Don’t do something if it’s going to make you uncomfortable, or simply because you don’t want to, in order to make someone else happy. There have been so many times I’ve felt pressured to go out just because my friend wants to—don’t be afraid to be honest with yourself and others.
6. Something that always makes me feel better if I’m feeling down on myself or sad, is writing a poem about myself. I’m able to express how I’m feeling in a symbolic way, recreating my life into a story that has a happy ending where I feel free, loved, and reunited with my true self. You don’t need to be an amazing writer to do this, just jot down your feelings, your story, and how you want it to end; your truth will set you free.
I hope these tips help you in your journey to self love and growth. Remember to be kind to yourself; choose love everyday!
You can also write love notes to yourself as physical reminders of your love. Place them on your mirrors, walls, doors, or teddy bears; Photo by Phoebe McGowan.