Love is amazing. It can create change and add value to our lives. But love comes in so many forms! Valentine’s Day traditionally has focused waaaaay too heavily on heterosexual and monogamous relationships. This heteronormative ideal marginalizes all other relationships, such as queer, non-monogamous, or asexual relationships.
Valentine’s Day is also overrun with commercials, romantic movies, cards, candy, gifts, and expensive dinners. It leaves many of us wondering, is there a way to celebrate Valentine’s Day that doesn’t buy into these washed up ideas of what love is?
We’ve rounded up 5 ways to celebrate this February 14th that doesn’t support heteropatriarchal capitalism! Yes! Let’s go!
1. Celebrate All Forms of Love
Valentine’s Day often make it seen as if romantic heterosexual love is the highest form of love, which is just not true at all! It also can make those who are single feel like they are missing out somehow, even if they are perfectly happy doing their own thing.
Reject this idea by celebrate all the love in your life! Celebrate Galentine’s Day with your best girl friends, make cards for your siblings and parents, call your grandma and tell her how much you love her.
There are so many powerful relationships in our life that we often forget to celebrate on Valentine’s Day. Remember that your family (biological or not!) is one of the most powerful forces of love in your life, and that is definitely something worth celebrating!
2. Reject Capitalism
Valentine’s Day perpetuates the message that if you don’t spend money on someone, you don’t really love them. This is a bunch of bullsh*t! What really tells someone that you care about them is spending time with them and treating them with kindness.
Instead of buying an expensive gift for your significant other or friends, go on an adventure with them! Go for a hike, make dinner together at home, or have a movie night. Just spend some quality time together.
If you do want to give them a gift, try making it yourself! Write them a song, paint them a picture, bake them cookies, or frame a cute picture of both of you. These gifts will mean way more than a necklace or teddy bear, trust me!
Alternatively, buy a gift that supports small, local businesses, not large chains and corporations. Donate to a favorite charity in that person’s name. These are both good ways to reject capitalism and spread the love!
3. Practice Self Love
Valentine’s Day should be about celebrating all love, so don’t forget to love yourself!
Self-love is an especially important practice for those who feel marginalized in our society. Just existing in a space that makes you feel invisible is radical in itself! Self-care and love is vital.
Take a bubble bath, get a massage, read a new book, watch five episodes of your favorite show, go for a run, or make some yummy food just for yourself. It can be small, just make time on Feb. 14th to take care of you! Because you are amazing and worth all the love in the world.
4. Volunteer
Spread the love! Volunteer in your community on Valentine’s Day. Contact local organizations, shelters, and community centers ahead of time and see how you can help.
You can also organize your own event such as a book or clothing drive, a park clean up, a fundraiser for a local women’s shelter, etc. Remember to keep the work going past Valentine’s Day though!
5. Don’t Celebrate at All!
There is no need to celebrate a holiday you don’t enjoy or support. Treat Feb. 14th like every other day and continue to practice love all year round!
Have any other ideas for how to have a feminist Valentine’s Day? Let us know in the comments!