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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

Four Relationship Rules to Toss

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at GSU chapter.

Men and Women Cannot be Just Friends

When it comes to matters of the heart, relationships can be messy and complicated. Fortunately, they do not have to be. For the woman who wants a platonic relationship with a man, simply set boundaries. Women in this age must maintain clear conditions for their company. This means saying what you want and do not want out of the relationship. Sometimes, men hear what they want to hear, hence, why this is crucial. The question isn’t if men and women can be companions, it’s if both parties are willing and happy to do just that. Be honest with yourself. How do you feel about this person and what do you get from the relationship? Is this relationship strong and healthy? Do you see yourself being friends with them for a lifetime, or for a season? Any relationship can work, but only if those involved are compatible and ready to be in that relationship. You might find that someone who works today may not work a year from now, or three years from now. Additionally, someone you would never have considered now may fit into your life later on. People grow and evolve to and from one another, and sometimes we grow separately. If you have a guy friend, even if you’re attracted to him, or he to you, being just friends is still an option. You must love the friendship more than you love the idea or possibility of anything more.

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Wait for Him to Make the First Move

Women have been taught to be the pursued and wait, but that does not always work. Sometimes a girl needs to be more proactive when she wants someone. Sitting idle and waiting, hoping the one you fancy will have the confidence to walk over is too much. Well, what about coaxing him or her over by looking them in the eye, showing some interest? Most woman know how to flirt, but what if this fails? Taking a stand is no longer taboo, so toss this rule aside and talk to them first. Remember, there is nothing more attractive than a smart, confident woman, so go forward with ease.

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Don’t Kiss on the First Date

When a woman leads with confidence and finds that the night is alight with good vibrations, she wants to relish in those emotions, not wallow in weary rules. Not for lack of understanding, the “no kiss on the first date” rule is meant to protect women’s integrity and is a respectable way to date. The problem is that women often get caught up in these guidelines, and sometimes stop themselves from having fun. Here’s a new rule, rate the date, the suitor’s character, your experience, and how you feel about it all on a scale from one to ten. Only nines and tens are worthy of an intimate moment with you, and do not take for granted letting anyone get that close to you. To some it may just be a kiss, but physically knowing someone is always supposed to mean something.  Kiss or no kiss, this decision is really based on what you want, so be firm in your actions.

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Play Hard to Get

This is by far the silliest rule yet, as if playing around in your own love life is ever a good idea. The best way to progress any relationship is to go forward with honesty and a touch of vulnerability. Don’t be afraid to let go and relax into the relationship. This is hard to do at first, and it may make you uncomfortable because our first instinct with someone new is to put on a show of perfection. Just know that no matter what happens, if you are being true to yourself, everything will turn out the way it is supposed to, without playing games. Source