Ellie and Syd, notorious lip balm addicts, review ten of their best and worst rated lip balms. Ellie reviews classic lip balms, throwing it back old school, while Syd reviews your pre-teen obsessions and recommends some more modern and effective options you’re probably better off spending your money on.
- Carmex
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7.8/10
I like Carmex because it comes in a tube and is extremely wet, as gross as that sounds. I apply it every night before bed because I need to feel like my lips are gonna be thoroughly moisturized throughout the entire night. That being said, the downside to Carmex is that it tastes disgusting. Truly, if I get it in my mouth I have to rinse it out immediately, and don’t get me started on when I’m wearing my retainer. I would recommend Carmex but only for the night time, not when you’re going about your day consuming food and drink and whatnot.
- Burt’s Bees
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5.8/10
Burt’s Bees is an extremely well-known brand. I remember my mom always using it when I was younger and I remember it always stinging when I applied it, which I liked. I want to feel like my lip balm is actually doing something, so if it doesn’t burn, I don’t want it. I use Burt’s Bees pretty daily but I don’t actually enjoy it anymore. I feel like I have to keep applying it and my lips feel dry not too long after I use it. Something about it has changed in my opinion and it doesn’t hold the same appeal as it used to. So, why, you ask, do I keep using it? I wish I knew.
- Chapstick
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1/10
Chapstick does not work. I think using chapstick is like rubbing a crayon on your lips. Sure, there’s something there but is it actually doing anything? I absolutely despise the fact that chapstick has a monopoly on lip balm in the sense that no matter what brand you use you’re most likely gonna call it chapstick. It’s like how Kleenex is only a brand of tissues but people call all tissues, Kleenex. This bothers me so much that I have trained myself to exclusively say lip balm and when I slip up I get genuinely angry. If chapstick works for you please tell me your secret.
- Blistex
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6/10
I don’t mind Blistex. I used it for a while and it was pretty good. I would put it on sort of the same playing field as Burt’s Bees. I stopped using it just because it felt like I had to reapply a lot. Honestly, if you don’t have serious dry lip issues and you’re just searching for a pretty good once in a while lip balm, I would recommend Blistex.
- Vaseline
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8/10
I use vaseline when my lips hurt. Say I went to class and forgot my water bottle in my room so I go to reach for my trusty lip balm and it’s mysteriously not in my backpack. That is a double whammy of dehydration and lack of lip balm creating very dry and cracking lips. This is when I go back to my apartment and throw on some Vaseline. Vaseline is not the type of thing I would use on a daily basis just because it’s so goopy and obvious on your lips, but, for lip repair purposes I recommend it for sure.
- CO Bigelow Rose Salve
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9/10
I’ve been using this brand of rose salve for three years now, and one little tin will last you months on end. I use rose salve in the morning, at night, every single day. I find myself ordering rose salve in a three-pack almost every year since I can run through two tins in one year. It has a perfect consistency that gives your lips this amazing dewy shine and feels slick, not thick. It also doesn’t taste god awful if it ever gets in your mouth and doesn’t have the entirely artificial rose scent. It’s also so versatile, as you can use it for your cuticles, elbows, and any dry areas that need attention, and it comes in tube form for easy travel! Overall, I couldn’t recommend this product more.
- Glossier’s Balm Dot Com
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7.5/10
Glossier definitely overhypes this product, as you don’t expect this lip balm to come in such a thick consistency. The packaging is smaller than you think, but I’ll give it points for lasting a really long time. They recently came out with a new “wild fig” flavor, that comes in coral, although they have a variety of pigmented and non pigmented flavors. I personally hate having lip balm tint or residue on my fingers after applying it, and this one lays on thick. I opted for their mint flavor, which has a refreshing taste but doesn’t give me enough of a minty tingle for my own satisfaction. And the tube is also a little hard to dispense the perfect amount of product. If you’re going to try this product, definitely buy one first before buying their three-pack.
- Dr. Bronner’s
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7/10
If you’re looking for a reliable, but strangely minty lip balm, this one is it. It’s only $3 and is pretty good, being that it’s made with organic beeswax, and doesn’t test on animals. These lip balms come in peppermint, naked (unflavored), orange ginger, and lemon-lime, but I’ve only tried peppermint (my favorite) and naked. It glides on very smoothly and makes your lips feel hydrated right away. If it works, it works! P.S. this is also a great stocking stuffer for any male friend, all of mine finally love using lip balm after I gave them these.
- EOS
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0/10
KEYWORD: middle school. These are probably the worst lip balms on this list besides Chapstick. I don’t know a single person who would recommend EOS lip balms after our middle school age. It’s settled now, but EOS did have a small mishap where a woman filed a lawsuit over her adverse reaction to these egg-shaped lip balms. I know multiple people who have suffered from itchy, swollen, and red lips after using these lip balms. Besides all that, these lip balms are terrible in terms of functionality. They’re bulky, uncomfortable to hold, and you feel like you’re wasting the entire rest of the product when you reach the bottom (stop putting these in the microwave!). I’d rather you be using any other product than EOS.
- Babylips
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3/10
These are such a throwback to our pre-teen years, where we were all obsessed with the crazy fun flavors and tints that barely ever even showed up on our lips. I’ll give them credit for being so fun to collect, but these lost a lot of points by leaving your lips looking like a pile of hot pink crustiness maybe thirty minutes after applying. These just don’t last and don’t age well in hot temperatures either, making them the biggest waste of your money as a thirteen-year-old.
It’s clear that Syd and Ellie did not always make the best choices in terms of lip balm, but hopefully the mistakes they’ve made and the triumphs they’ve experience will help someone else on their journey to moisturized lips.