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The Ins and Outs of a “Friends with Benefits” Relationship

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Georgia Southern chapter.

We’ve all been there and if you haven’t, it’s bound to happen at some point in your life. You find yourself in a friends-with-benefits (FWB) relationship, whether it’s on purpose or by accident, and your life just got a whole lot more complicated. If you don’t know what a friends with benefits relationship is, the name basically speaks for itself. It’s when two people who have established a friendship end up in a sexual relationship with each other. If you’re brave enough to venture into one of these relationships, there are a few things that you should take into consideration.

 

1.)    Communication, Communication, Communication!

You both need to have an understanding of what you guys want. Are you all just going to be sexually exclusive with each other or is it cool if you guys hook up with other people? Can you see yourself developing a possible future with that person or is there no possible future that can be developed what so ever? Are you guys just having sex or can you all hang out outside of the bedroom? Having both parties clear on the details can save each of you a lot of confusion, stress, and hurt feelings. 

 

2.)    Keep your emotions in check

When you’re participating in a FWB relationship, someone is eventually going to catch feelings for the other person. It’s only natural. If you start finding yourself catching feelings and you KNOW that there’s no stopping them, then you need to sit down and have a conversation with your “friend” to see where their head is at. Although this conversation may be extremely awkward to have, it is one that needs to happen eventually. Who knows… maybe they might feel the same way and you guys can possibly become more than friends. But if they don’t, then it would probably be in your interest to stop having sex with them. If you think that you can continue on then more power to you, but you’re most likely going to end up with your feelings hurt. 

3.)    Give them Space

This takes me back to point number one. If you guys have already established that you’re just going to be friends with benefits and nothing more, then don’t treat the relationship as anything more than what it is. Don’t blow up his/ her phone at 2 in the morning asking them where they are or why they aren’t texting you back. Don’t get mad when you find out that they’re trying to slide into other peoples’ D.M.’s. He is not your boyfriend and she is not your girlfriend. Your clinginess towards them is only going to make you look crazy and make you potentially lose a friend. 

4.)    Don’t take it too seriously

A FWB relationship isn’t meant to be taken too seriously. Most people embark on this type of relationship because they don’t want the stress that they think a committed boyfriend/ girlfriend relationship will bring, but they don’t want to have sex with random people at the same time. Having an FWB relationship shouldn’t stress you out. So if you’re going to choose to partake in one, have fun and be safe!

 

Jordan Wheeler

Georgia Southern '22

Jordan Wheeler is a Junior Pre-Law Philosophy major who attends Georgia Southern. Jordan loves writing, singing, and hanging out with friends.