Dear Brett Kavanaugh,

     Or should I call you Supreme Court Justice Kavanaugh? Well, nevermind. Until you issue a public apology, I respectfully refuse to call you that. So, Brett it is.

I’m sick and tired of society blaming women for sexual assault and I’m tired of women not being heard! As a female college student who can’t travel with a group of bodyguards all the time around campus, I shouldn’t have to live my life in constant fear of being assaulted. But, guess what? I do. I’m paranoid. I’m always looking around at night. I’m always scared to be too friendly to men I don’t know, because I don’t want to give off the “wrong impression.” And men like you, who ridicule women for coming forward with their stories and who don’t understand the struggles of women, are only making things worse.

     Since I was a little girl, my parents and my older brothers have been drilling certain behaviors into my head about things I need to do to make sure I’m safe when I’m out and about.

  • Don’t wear clothes that “show too much skin”! Dress “conservatively” and “classy”!
  • Don’t walk in a parking garage by yourself!
  • Don’t put your cup down at parties!
  • Always look at the cars behind you to make sure you’re not being followed!
  • Never let your phone die!
  • Carry your keys when walking to your car! Lock your doors as soon as you get inside!
  • Don’t talk to strangers!

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH!!!!!! The list can go on and on.

     Do you realize that I typed that list in under a minute, because I've heard it so many times? Look… I’m SICK of following rules that only apply to females. When I asked the males in my life what they do to prevent sexual assault, they said THEY DON’T REALLY THINK ABOUT IT! Well, that must be nice. I wouldn't know... It’s terrifying to live in a country where people like you get promoted to positions of authority just because your gender is deemed more superior.

We’re in 2018, yet society is still HEAVILY male dominated. I don’t even feel comfortable enough to talk about sexual assault with my male peers because they don’t take it seriously. They really don’t understand the struggle. They think that we’re just “dramatic.” Mr. Kavanaugh, I have a problem with how you just outright denied Christine Ford’s story. You didn’t respect her, or the amount of courage it took for her to come forwardand neither did our President. I can’t imagine being in her shoes. She was outright mocked by half of the country for an event that she has been talking to her therapist and her husband about for years. Women should not have to hold in their stories of sexual assault. Period.

When will the time come when we hold men accountable for their actions instead of blaming women? Will that time ever come?

A woman shouldn’t have to fight for the right to be HEARD and BELIEVED about a crime against her own body. The amount of trauma that a sexual assault victim endures for years and years after the fact is enough to make someone crazy. They deserve love, sympathy, and support. I’m tired of people saying, “Well, why did it take so long for her to come forward?” Because she was SCARED, that’s why. Larry Nassar abused the Team USA gymnasts for decades… and the girls never came forward because they were afraid of the consequences. They didn’t want their hard work and training to go to waste because they told their truth about someone in a position of authority.

Why did I have to buy a taser and pepper spray before coming to college? Why did my dad have to show me self defense moves just in case something happens? This is the world that people like YOU have created for me and my future children.

Mr. Kavanaugh, I understand that you have two daughters. I'm sure they're a joy. Do you want your daughters to grow up in this type of society? Wouldn't you want your daughters to be heard and believed if they were ever sexually assaulted? You have to be the example.

Getting drunk isn’t an excuse. Getting drunk isn’t an excuse. Getting drunk isn’t an excuse. Getting drunk isn’t an excuse. Getting drunk isn’t an excuse.

No matter how many times people makes jokes about you only having a “few beers”, it doesn’t change the fact that those beers led to an event that changed Christine Ford’s life. There's plenty of young men that casually get drunk in high school without sexually assaulting someone. I am extremely disappointed that the Supreme Court Justice of my generation handled this situation so poorly. Is this really what you want your legacy to be? America is supposed to be land of the free and home of the brave, yet our country didn't support this brave woman. They voted for you instead. Remember that.

 

Sincerely, 

An upset college student named Amanda Arnold.