I firmly believe that the TV show Lizzie McGuire gives invaluable tips for friends, dating, and just surviving in 21st century society. Even though the show was a defining feature of my childhood, a lot of its teachings are still relevant as we move into adult life. (And we all know these fashion styles will make a comeback eventually.)
Take Season 2, Episode 18: “Just Friends.” These are two words we rely on to not break a guy’s heart we actually care about, but at the same time feel horrible to hear from the other end.
We’ve all been there. There’s always that friend you’ve felt a little bit different for, or maybe a guy you’ve been in love with for years but you take on the role of friend so that he won’t figure it out. Either way, it sucks to be pushed back into the realm of “just friends.”
The episode starts off with Miranda asking Lizzie if she’ll ask long-time crush Ethan Craft to the Sadie Hawkins dance, and Lizzie immediately says no.
So Lizzie finally works up the courage to ask him…but then doesn’t get the response she was hoping for.
So Lizzie sits in her room, questioning her own judgment, and wondering where she could have gone wrong.
And Gordo’s guy-advice is pretty straightforward.
So Lizzie decides to become Ethan’s type. She enlists Gordo and Miranda’s help to do some top-notch spying.
And she even has Gordo go undercover to find out some important information on a personal level.
And with all this insider knowledge, Lizzie takes the formulaic approach to become Ethan’s dream mystery woman.
But when she asks him to the dance again, nothing’s changed.
And that hurts. It really does.
But luckily, Lizzie’s friends and family are there to remind her she’s awesome just the way she is, and Gordo even dances with her in her own backyard. In the end, you still have people that care about you–whether it’s in a romantic way or not (and by the end of the last season, it is!) And having some form of love, even if it’s not the kind you wanted, can make things feel OK.
Moral of the story: When you feel a sort of romantic attraction towards another person, it’s hard to envision them not having the same feelings towards you. Especially in a culture where Ross and Rachel end up together and Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake’s characters become more than “friends with benefits,” it’s hard to realize that you two may not amount to something more than friends. And like Lizzie, we’ve all been there–often many times.
It’s not that they don’t like you. They probably like you a lot, or else they wouldn’t talk to you. It’s not that you’re not pretty enough, or not smart enough, that you say the wrong things, or that you don’t have sex appeal. It’s just there’s no “chemistry” from his end.
And you’re not dumb for having feelings and he’s not dumb because he doesn’t have the same ones. (Ethan just so happens to be generally dumb.) Sometimes no one’s in the wrong, it’s just that there’s nothing right.
And like Lizzie, you WILL find someone who feels the same way for you. You may just have to wait until the end of season two to do so.