A few months ago a friend asked me why I haven’t tried online dating if I was interested in having a relationship. Various reasons popped into my head: my lack of transportation, catfishes and psychos. Mainly psychos. I have seen the Ted Bundy special on Netflix…yikes.
Anyway, I told my friend that when I turned 20, I would download a dating app. True to my word, I downloaded not one, but two dating apps: Hinge and Bumble. I was skeptical from the get-go of the results of the apps and the people on there. The apps because for both you must pay to have access to all of the benefits and options. The people because why do we need apps to meet other people? For a long period of time, before technology was developed, people met face to face and made judgments based from encounters with a person and decided whether or not they wanted to date or be with said person.
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Going online seemed unnatural to me. I get to see the person’s pictures, some of their favorite things or values but it just didn’t seem real to me. I thumbed through many guys pictures and profiles and got a sense that these short profiles didn’t really capture the person they are or may be. I know, I know… that’s what the dating part is for.
I started talking to someone on Bumble, actual conversations. I mentioned that I really liked pho, he mentioned a place he’d been to and then asked me if I’d like to go there with him. I said yes…then proceeded to have a mini freak out.
How was I going to get there?
What if he’s crazy?
What if he’s a 50-year-old posing as a 22-year-old?
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The possibilities were endless. My friends all told me to send me all the information I had about him just in case. That didn’t really help my nerves at all. If anything, it made me afraid to go out on the date. I’d always dreamed of being picked up for a date the traditional way but suddenly my friends were suggesting Uber or meeting on campus.
I was sort of scared and a bit freaked out. I turned my Snapchat location on and told about 5 other people it was there, just in case. The date happened to be very awesome! He picked me up, we talked in the car, he held the door for me at the restaurant, he wouldn’t order before I had, there were no awkward pauses and there was a lot of laughter. He was and is terrific. Afterward he asked for my number and we still text.
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It was my first date ever so the bar had been set pretty high; however, I think it’s sad that instead of just being very excited for it I was, also, unsettled by all of the unknown factors that come with dating online strangers.
Although I did have this nice encounter, I’m not actively searching through them for dates or men. I was excited about it but also scared. I didn’t like that feeling so hopefully next time I will meet someone I want to date in person.
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