It’s finally starting to feel like a normal season of The Bachelorette! Tayshia is a queen who puts up with no sh*t.
Harvard Should Drop Its Tuition Prices ASAP
Rebecca: It’s Ashley and Jared! I didn’t love them together at first because I liked their friendship, but I came around to it. Hearing them on Demi Burnett’s podcast really opened my eyes to their relationship and how much they love each other. Overall, the “Grown-A*s Man Challenge” is actually hysterical, and let me tell you why.
First, I didn’t realize that a*s is allowed to be said on TV, so that’s great. The smartness test was a flop for a certain favorite man. Bennett mentions Harvard (again), but he gets a lot of questions wrong. Tayshia and the other men proceed to joke about Bennett’s alma mater. I was dying of laughter.
Next was a strange tug of war challenge where the men were tied at the waist. Bennett backs out of this challenge because of an old knee injury. Geez.
The breakfast in bed challenge was actually sweet. I agree, Tayshia. I also love a man who can cook. Chasen stripping down was cute, but boyish. He rubs me the wrong way, and I’m not sure why. Plus, Bennet’s robe was pique. He’s a man who’s secure with himself. As Tayshia said, he’s bougie. Very bougie. It borders on too much for me, but he made homemade beignets, y’all. Jared and Ashley certainly saw that Tayshia appreciated it.
The “Man Child” award went to Ed. I still don’t know who he is or where he came from, though I applaud him for being willing to carry around a baby doll until Taysia tells him he doesn’t have to anymore. Despite losing two of the three challenges, Bennett won the “Grown A*s Man” award because of his impressive and romantic moment. He also went right in for the kiss, which I thought was a bit too much. While I appreciate his confidence, Bennett may have taken things a bit over the top for me. The other men weren’t too happy.
Jess: We start out with our classic shot of the La Quinta Resort & Club sign, as if we don’t know where they are this season even though we’ve seen this sign at least two hundred times. Nonetheless, Tayshia looks absolutely gorgeous. The high pony, the cute print green dress and that necklace, I’m LIVING for it.
The men head off into the unknown, AKA into one of my favorite opening montages to a group date I think I’ve ever seen in the entirety of this franchise.
Space odyssey music blares as the group approaches at the sight of a plain white mannequin with an apron and a baby in tow (already seeing problematic gender roles here, ABC).
“This is the story of one woman and her quest for love,” the announcer booms. “She’s been through it all and now she knows what she’s looking for. She’s looking for a man. She’s looking for a grown. A*s. Man.”
Hands down the strangest intro to a date I’ve ever seen in my life. If I was Tayshia, I don’t know whether I would cry with laughter or tackle the mannequin in fury that this was so low-key problematic and projecting an image of internalized misogyny.
Yet, none other than one of my favorite couples in Bachelor Nation, Ashley and Jared, run out from behind the mannequin to host this date! This Pisces-Scorpio power duo is one of my favorite couples to come out of the franchise, despite the fact that they’re definitely here to pursue more Instagram followers.
Now, I know this show isn’t super deep, but I couldn’t help but notice how problematic the way the show defines what a “grown a*s man” is.
The first challenge of the “grown a** man” date simply proves that labels are not everything. You can go to Harvard, like Bennett, and have no idea how to spell “limousine” or solve basic math problems. Shout out to Demar for representing Arizona State! My mother and I were personally dying with laughter when Bennett tried to defend himself by saying, “that’s kind of a poorly worded question,” as Jared had to stop himself from laughing.
The next challenge was hilariously problematic as the men played physical tug of war while running opposite ways. Ben literally dragged Ed across the floor with, as Chasen calls them, his “chicken legs.” Bennett passes on the physical challenge as he stands there nodding like Clark Kent.
Lastly, the breakfast in bed challenge. A) I love Demar and his mimosas, B) Ivan is a sweetheart and C) I despised Chasen’s move (as Bennett asserts). Personally, I can totally understand why Bennett won the grown a*s man challenge.
A man who wants to chill in bed with a robe, make me breakfast and feed it to me? I’ll take that over someone who can win at tug of war any day. Plus, he talks about how he’s confident in himself and not afraid to be who he is, which arguably is a more fitting definition of what a man is than any of the other standards throughout this group date.
I do respect how Ed tried to own the man-child award and the coinciding baby (Carlos) that came with it. Bennett, I will admit, took it a little too far at the end as the rest of the men glared off into the distance.
Producers, Stop this “Smokeshow” Madness
Rebecca: First, Tayshia is looking fire in that white dress! I have to applaud her style. She’s stunning. On to the rest of the night.
Oh, Bennett. No. Bro, you should’ve changed from the robe. That’s too much, doll. Also, the diploma is a bit much. Perhaps his Harvard arrogance is revealing itself. Chasen, you can call Bennett out on his robe all you want, but that T-shirt isn’t cocktail party appropriate, either. Plus, stealing Tayshia after Bennett already asked is childish.
Now, we’re finally starting to get to know these men since the first four episodes revolved around Dale. I’ve definitely got some favorites from the night (though I still love Brendan). Ben is really smooth. He knows all the right moves. Plus, he asks to kiss her! That’s consent 101, people! He’s got some vibes I’m feeling. I like how Ivan and Tayshia are bonding, especially because of how they both want to build an empire. Also, the blindfold with the strawberries is quite sensual. He does kiss her while she’s blindfolded, but Tayshia was into it, so I’ll let it slide. Ivan is a dark horse, Tayshia. I feel that.
Bennett stirs the pot. I’m guessing he’s trying to be strategic, but he takes things really far. He questions Chasen and brings Ed’s name into it. Yet, Ed takes that bait and dives in, bringing it up to Tayshia. Now, Chasen and Ed are fighting. It’s not even worth it to repeat the bull they spew at each other. They’re calling out chicken legs and shirt sizes. I agree, Ben. They’re not grown a*s men, and I hate this drama. Poor Tayshia doesn’t need to deal with their dumb drama. Just drop both Chasen and Ed.
I wanted her to give the rose to Ben, but Ivan also seems like a great guy, so I don’t mind her choice that much. We’ll have to see how everything else unfolds.
Jess: Like Rebecca said, showing up to the after party in a robe was a little too much for me and kind of obnoxious.
I also think we saw way too much Chasen in this episode and I’m putting this out into the universe: producers please stop this. We don’t want to see Chasen and Ed fight as Ed yells at Chasen that his shirt is a medium and Chasen screams in rage, “IT’S ACTUALLY A LARGE!” We went to see our gems, Ben and Ivan.
We also should be focusing on literally how absolutely stunning and glowing Tayshia is. Because that’s clearly more important than any of the drama tonight ever could be. Yet, Ed goes as far to say that Chasen is “spin[ning] a web of deceit.” I don’t really think this California bro is that deep, Ed, but okay.
Producers show us more Ben because their interaction was somehow a combination of being both adorable and sexy all at once. Their dynamic: immaculate. Then we have Ivan, pulling out the big guns by blindfolding her while feeding her strawberries. Literally the seduction, the sensuality, the big moves—show us this rather than the least sexiest thing this episode than two grown men (who did not win the grown a** men award) argue incessantly while one nicknames himself “the Wolverine.”
Ed, however, is overcompensating. There’s no reason to focus on another guy if you feel solid in your relationship with the lead. Both were cringe in different ways.
I would kill for footage of watching Chris Harrison run around La Quinta for hours than watch a second more of this.
No, Smoke Show Is NOT a Compliment
Rebecca: What is with all of this inner Wolverine crap that Chasen keeps bringing up? That’s actually creepy. No woman wants a man who has an inner Wolverine. I don’t think that bringing it up in front of all the men is a smart choice either. That’s awkward. Kudos to Bennett for taking the fake baby doll away and trying to diffuse tension, but then I start to wonder if he’s still playing games with the other men.
NO WOMAN WANTS TO BE CALLED A SMOKE SHOW. At least, I don’t. That feels degrading. I hope that tonight puts things at ease for Tayshia because she’s now worried about men having a hidden agenda. Focus on the connections that are real and the men who do things for you like Ben and Joe, yet of course that doesn’t happen.
Ed and Chasen need to put all of their drama aside. All of this needs to be done. Tayshia doesn’t want to put up with any physical altercations. When Chasen tries to apologize, Ed keeps circling. I’m actually glad the other men, like Zac C., tell them to just put all of this garbage behind them. I also don’t mind Zac anymore. It seems as if he’s a really honest and mature man.
It’s interesting seeing our first rose ceremony since Clare only had one, maybe two (I can’t remember). I question both of Chasen and Ed’s motives. I think they’re both boys. Tayshia needs a man. I don’t know if producers influence her decisions, but seeing this drama probably helps ratings.
One last note: ENOUGH WITH THE SMOKE SHOW! It’s gross and needs to be put to bed.
Jess: I first want to acknowledge how Demar has brought back the return of the iconic salmon jacket! That is honestly way more interesting than any of this Chasen drama ever could be.
I applaud Chasen for trying to clear the air and handling things in a calmer way. But at the same time, it’s just awkward and I am wondering what everyone in the house’s zodiac sign is at this moment so I can analyze all of this.
Also, I find it hilarious that as a thirty-something year old man, Bennett still uses SAT scores to evaluate someone’s intelligence. So Harvard of him.
I want us to acknowledge that we finally get to see more of Dr. Joe, who is an absolutely amazing man! Please show me more of Joe rather than a second more of Chasen and Ed tattling on each other. Plus, Bennett setting up a mini Paris date and Demar writing a beautiful poem (literally would have burst into tears on the spot), I want more of this footage you’re hiding from us, producers.
Then we see the guys talking s***, which I always appreciate about The Bachelorette because we get to see that the guys are just as petty, if not more petty, than the women of The Bachelor. Bennett chortles in disgrace at the thought that Chasen could only think of “a noun” rather than “an adjective.” His evil laugh literally got me.
The men, later, decide to swoop in around Chasen while Zac C., AKA Jr. Matthew McConaughey, diffuses the situation. Zac C. plays this situation perfectly by putting all the drama aside and just enjoying his time with Tayshia.
Chris Harrison reappears to strike fear in everyone, his classic go to, while we still all have to groan about having to put up with this stupid Ed/Chasen drama.
“He Just Jumped the F***ing Fence.”
Rebecca: I have two words: Ed’s faces! Throughout the whole episode, he makes some very weird faces, such as when he first walked into the Grown A*s man date. I don’t think anything can top his faces as he attempts to lift weights while the other men talk about the drama he’s embroiled in.
One of the men accurately guess this group date will be a wrestling match. I’m not feeling it. I hate violence. Even though I used to watch WWE, that part of me is gone. It sucks for the men, such as Joe, who feel as though they can’t compete with former NFL players and other contact sports. Joe can’t smack talk at all, but it’s still cute.
Also, Chasen’s line “you’re not waking up tomorrow after this” had been overhyped during promos. It’s during a time when the men are supposed to get in each other’s faces and smack talk. Plus, Brendan takes it like a champ. It doesn’t bother him at all. Luckily, he also doesn’t mind that Ed feels him up when he does the leg move wrong.
Oops I was wrong. Chasen also says the line after Chris Harrison walks in and declares Bachelorette WrestleMania will have a live audience. The prize is also time with Tayshia. Chasen’s actually frightening. He’s threatening that Ed will need an ice bath because Wolverine is coming out. It’s a competition, but it’s not a death match.
Wells Adams is here! I love him so much, and his relationship with Sarah Hyland is adorable. The producers are certainly bringing in all the favorites to make up for the fact that there’s no traveling this year. I do think that oiling the men up is hovering on the same line as the dodgeball date fiasco. On The Bachelorette, producers really seem to sexualize the men a lot. The Bachelor also sexualizes women. This is a problem the whole franchise needs to solve at this point.
As for the matches themselves, most are lackluster. Joe loses and declares he’s “a lover, not a fighter, sending Twitter, or at least one of my favorite Bachelor fans Brett Vergara and other Bachelor alum, into an uproar. Poor Brendan goes down hard. Jordan has a scrape. Ben is bleeding. The men are definitely not taking this low-key. Plus, we haven’t seen Chasen and Ed fight, but it seems like we never will.
Ed pulls Chris aside claiming he has a condition where his shoulders dislocate often and he doesn’t want to fight. So, this gives Noah the chance to wrestle because Chris allows anyone to wrestle for Tayshia. Wells comments on Noah’s awful mustache, and some of the other men feel as though he’s being childish by getting involved in this date. They seemed like they were fighting to the death. Chasen wins, but Tayshia invites Noah to the after party because he was bold. Of course, most of the men aren’t pleased they’ll be losing time, so more drama is about to go down.
Jess: Ed: “Being on a group date with Chasen, that would obviously suck.”
The producers: “Let’s put Chasen on the date with Ed and have them wrestle each other.”
Bennett predicts, correctly, that there will “be some dramatic events,” which should be the new tagline for the show rather than “the most dramatic season ever.”
Can I just say this date made me fall in love with Dr. Joe even more? He’s such a nice guy who literally says “You’re a really nice guy!” as his smack talk.
Seeing Wells Adams on my screen almost made 2020 worth it. He’s absolutely hilarious and just an icon, especially seeing him and Chris Harrison completely roast each other. Chef’s kiss.
I cannot even imagine being present for this date. I feel like I would be absolutely horrified while also not being able to look away, a classic theme of this franchise.
Ed hears Ben is bleeding and is like no thank you, and while it’s not a great move I honestly don’t blame him. I would not want to fight Chasen either.
However, I don’t blame Noah for jumping into the ring. On this show, you have limited time with the lead as it is. I applaud him for doing what it takes to get more time with the lead! After all, that’s literally what this show is about. The other guys are just jealous they didn’t think to jump over the fence (throwback to Colton Underwood’s iconic fence jump) first.
Plus, I have no idea how Noah could wrestle in black skinny jeans. Literally, give the man points for that one.
“We Give You, A Princess”
Rebecca: So, I don’t love how Tayshia allows Noah to join the evening; however, it’s her season, so she can do as she pleases. Yet, it’s not right that Noah steals Tayshia first. The men aren’t there to be best friends, but they do need to be respectful of each other. Also, Tayshia hates the mustache too! I’m glad he agrees to shave it because I’m done looking at it.
Brendan steals my heart again. Their connection is real, and Tayshia cuts off his rambles with a kiss. I said it last week and I’ll say it again: I want a Brendan. Ben, another favorite of mine, worries me a bit because he’s not trying to fight for his time. At some point, you need to make that effort.
Noah saying goodbye to his mustache was so dumb to watch. Then he interrupts Jordan to let Tayshia shave his mustache. It’s super cringe. I can’t believe she would be down to shave a man. He also looks like a completely different person. It’s so strange! Yet poor Ben doesn’t get time to talk to her, but that’s partially on him. He should’ve tried to find her earlier. He lost some points in my book. Still, Noah does steal her twice.
Tayshia awards Noah the rose for “proving himself to her.” A lot of the men are pissed that he took advantage of the group date, but it was Tayshia’s choice to include him. I’m not happy either. Tensions are rising, and it will be a lot bigger than the trifle between Ed and Chasen.
Jess: Personally, I don’t blame Noah for stealing Tayshia away. Like I said, on this show you have such limited time with the lead as it is. You have to take any amount of time you can get with the lead and I think Noah did just that. Tayshia could have said no and she also clearly wanted him there!
Ed, again, is overcompensating for something. If a guy was 29 dating a 25-year-old girl, no one would think anything of it. Not here for these double standards. I say, if you’re on this show, focus on your own relationship rather than other peoples with the lead.
I did feel bad for Ben. I don’t think he didn’t try; he just had this perfect image in his head and it’s hard on this show to execute that, especially when you’re competing against 20 other men. PLUS, he uses the word “manifesting!” Is he on manifestation TikTok like I am?
I agree with Rebecca, I love Tayshia and Brendan together. Her cutting him off with a kiss while he was rambling was absolutely adorable.
Jordan asserts he’s a Leo, and I automatically know that he and Tayshia will not work out because of this. A Virgo female, Leo male combination is a recipe for disaster, unfortunately. Still think he’s husband material though.
Also, I didn’t hate the shaving of the mustache! It was like Mia Thermpolis after her princess transformation in The Princess Diaries. He looked a million times better, and I appreciated this new iconic look that Jonathon Van Ness certainly would have approved.
Ben shouldn’t be blaming Noah for him not talking to Tayshia. I understand there was a miscommunication and I personally love Ben, but still to blame it on Noah is a stretch. Chasen goes as far to call Noah crashing the date (which he didn’t even crash) “a sin.” I would take three hours of footage of Noah over any more footage of Chasen.
Ed is just jealous he has no chance of getting a group date rose, period.
Forgot to mention, this was one of my favorite outfits Tayshia has ever worn on this show. That copper jumpsuit, literally glowing.
The Cutest Bonus Scene Ever
Rebecca: Why couldn’t we see Brendan and Tayshia on these weird horse toys during the episode! This is actually adorable. She doesn’t stop laughing with him. I see it. I see it so hard!
Jess: I always wish the show would show us some of the more lighthearted moments, and this hands down was one of them. Also, which producer dug up this weird horse idea? While I would have been cringing, Tayshia absolutely loved it, making my love for this Scorio/Virgo duo grow even more!
We’ll have to see what happens next week.