Nintendo has a habit of dropping new game announcements with very little warning—and even less foresight. On Feb. 27, thousands of Pokemon fans across the world were left scratching their heads when Nintendo announced that a new “Direct” (Nintendo’s terminology for a short online stream showcasing newly announced content, for the uninformed) would be streaming at 6 a.m., Pacific Time. Even more strange, it would only cough up to about seven minutes worth of content: measly in comparison to their average length of 30 minutes.
Still, what’s a Pokemon fan to do? Fans wiped the sleep from their eyes at 6 a.m., flipped open their laptops and were greeted with glorious news—a brand new Pokemon generation was coming with games titled “Pokemon Sword” and “Pokemon Shield,” both of which will take place in a region based on the United Kingdom. In typical Pokemon tradition, the reveal came with pictures of the three new starter Pokemon, or the Pokemon that the player will get to start their adventure with first.
And do you know something else? There’s a clear winner out of the three.
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There’s the grass pokemon, Grookey, which appears to be some sort of hybrid between a monkey and a furby. The fire pokemon, Scorbunny, has a comically large bandage on its nose and is proving itself to be a fan favorite already. But prepare yourself for the name of the last one—Sobble.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. Clickbait! Sobble doesn’t look depressed or British! But bear with me. Pokemon is many things, but creative with its names, it is not. Grookey is a “green monkey.” Scorbunny is a “scorch bunny.” This naming nomenclature isn’t new, either—names like Sandshrew, Muk and Ponyta are fairly self-explanatory. Which can only mean one thing. Sobble is going to integrate tears into its persona, one way or another. And that seems to be the direction that fans are taking off in, too.
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Something about a big-eyed, sad lizard has resonated with people across the internet, myself included. All of us just want to give him one big hug.
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I’ve never seen a Pokemon that so perfectly encapsulates my feelings as a human being forced to occupy this hell earth.
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Who are you going to chose?
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