Picture this: You’re a freshman, taking in your first few weeks of college. Everything is so new and exciting, there seems to be a never-ending supply of events and activities to take part in, and it feels like you never run out of new people to meet and new things to try. But eventually life will slow down, and in those moments you start scrolling through the pictures on your phone or reading old texts. A pit grows in your stomach, and you suddenly remember that you really miss the faces in those pictures and the names who sent those texts. You didn’t think it would happen this soon, but you’re feeling homesick.
Although some of us may not expect it, homesickness will strike every college freshman sooner or later. Most freshman have never lived on their own before, and things that they took for granted at home such as home cooked meals, the privacy of their own room, and hugs from parents at the end of a hard day will suddenly seem like luxuries. But while homesickness is common and even to be expected, that doesn’t mean it should be left unmanaged. So here are a few tips for managing those first year homesickness blues:
1. Remind Yourself That It’s Normal
When you start feeling those first few pangs of homesickness, you might be inclined to feel embarrassed or self-conscious about those emotions. After all, you’re a grown adult now, and should be able to take on living on your own without craving to hug your dog or eat one of your mom’s homemade meals. But it is important to remember that feeling lonely and homesick is totally normal. Adjusting to this new lifestyle of living on your own on a college campus will take time, just like getting used to any other new experience does. So don’t brush off these emotions or feel embarrassed about them – instead, accept what you’re feeling as normal and to be expected, then start working towards finding a remedy.
2. Get Out of Your Room!
A natural reaction to feeling homesick could be to shut the door to your dorm, crawl under your covers, and hide away from the world. While this isn’t a bad thing, and it is good to take time for yourself, don’t let this become habit. Sometimes the best cure to feeling lonely or homesick is simply to leave your room. Try exploring campus, taking part in sporting events and activities, and making new friends. When you keep your mind busy and distracted with all of the new, exciting things college life has to offer, you’ll find yourself thinking less and less about home and more about what your new life has in store for you.
3. Stay Close to People from Home (But Not Too Close)
Just like there is no shame in feeling homesick, there is also no reason to feel embarrassed about wanting to call your mom or your best friend from back home all the time. You’re away at college, not stranded on a deserted island with no cell service – so don’t act like it! Especially over the first couple months when the homesickness is most severe, stay in touch with your loved ones from home through calls, texts, and letters. Send your family and friends updates of your new life and ask for all the news from back home to help you feel close. But don’t forget to set boundaries; while it is good to call your mom, don’t call her every single hour of every day. While staying close to home will help you fight off the homesickness, getting involved in your new life and allowing yourself some separation from your life back home will help you adjust and make campus feel more like home.
4. Find A Routine
Another way to make campus your home away from home is to develop a schedule and routine for how you do life. Back home, one of the things that probably made life so consistent and comfortable was having daily and weekly routines of events you attended, duties you kept, and work that you did. Coming to college doesn’t mean that you should leave that routine behind; doing so will make your life lazy, uncomfortable, and eventually contribute to that feeling of homesickness. Find yourself a routine and pretty soon life at school will start feeling just as organized and normal as it did back home.
5. Don’t Fight It Alone
In the midst of homesickness blues, one of the strongest feelings you might experience is that you are completely alone. Back home, you were constantly surrounded by family and friends that loved you unconditionally and had your back, so coming to college on your own may feel like you’re a little fish in a big pond that no one around you cares about or understands. But in the midst of loneliness, remind yourself that you are not alone and that you don’t have to fight homesickness on your own. Reach out to your classmates, roommates, and others around you on campus and begin building relationships with people you can trust and confide in. And once you build those friendships, chances are you will find most people struggle with those same feelings of loneliness and homesickness and that you were never as alone as you thought you were.