We all express and receive love in different ways, known as love languages. The five love languages is a concept developed by the author of “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts,” Gary Chapman, Ph.D. This New York Times International Bestseller teaches readers how to keep relationships fresh and passionate, and how to resolve conflict by identifying and nurturing love languages.
Signs of love and affection can easily get lost in translation when you and your partner are speaking different love languages, which may lead to feelings of resentment and anger causing conflict within the relationship. However, identifying and being able to speak your partner’s love language makes it easier to meet their needs, understand who they are as a person, and cherish the relationship.
Words of affirmation
Those whose love language is words of affirmation highly value verbal acknowledgments. If your partner’s love language is words of affirmation, it is important to incorporate kind words of encouragement and love into your daily routine whether it is in passing, in an important conversation, or as a handwritten note.
Here are a few tips to help speak your partner’s love language:
- Acknowledge the work they do daily
- Compliment their appearance
- Tell them “thank you” often
- Say “I love you” often
- Provide verbal encouragement
Acts of Service
If your love language is acts of service, then you see a lot of value when someone goes out of their way to do something for you that makes your life easier. It is often a feeling of acknowledgment and thinking “They did this for me so that I wouldn’t have to.”
Here are a few tips to help speak your partner’s love language:
- Do their least favorite chore for them
- Make them a meal
- Run errands for them
Gifts
If your love language is receiving gifts, then you often feel appreciated and loved with tangible items. To some, this may seem greedy and materialistic, but in reality it is a way of saying “I saw this and thought of you.” These gifts don’t always have to be expensive items either, they can be simple items that hold a lot of meaning.
Here are a few tips to help speak your partner’s love language:
- Give them their favorite snack
- Bring them their favorite meal or drink
- Bring them a flower bouquet
Quality time
Quality time is a love language for people who feel important when their partner prioritizes time for them and only them. This means eliminating all distractions and just spending time with one another.
Here are a few tips to help speak your partner’s love language:
- Minimize distractions
- Put your phone away
- Actively listen
- Focus on the person in front of you
- Engage in conversation
Physical touch
Physical touch refers to expressing and receiving love through physical connection. This does not necessarily mean sexual touch; it is the little brushes, hand-holding, and hugs that can be expressed throughout the day.
Here are a few tips to help speak your partner’s love language:
- Holding their hand
- Spontaneous hugs and kisses
- Initiate physical contact
If you want to learn more about discovering your love language you can visit https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language and take the free “What’s your love language?” quiz.