Long distance relationships are hard. I am in the first serious relationship of my life, and now that I am back at Furman, I am in my first long distance relationship. I am honestly struggling. My main love language is quality time, and I am having trouble finding ways to spend genuine quality time with my significant other from such a distance. My therapist and I have been brainstorming ways to help me feel this connection. We decided on having specified hang out times. Even though we were texting all day, I realized that as some passed I wasn’t feeling as deeply for them. But, we are on the road to having dedicated quality time. Here are my top 5 favorite ways to feel connected to my significant other:
1. Morning Phone Calls
These calls usually only last a few minutes each. It just helps me to feel connected to start the day with a sleepy good morning chat.
2. Date Nights
Every Thursday night at 8 pm we spend a few hours uninterrupted just spending time together. This dedicated time helps me to feel less pressure to be texting all day. I know that we have dedicated time to catch up, so I feel less guilty about taking some time away from my phone during the day.
3. Weekly Check-Ins!
Every Sunday, we have an hour dedicated to sharing any feelings we didn’t have time to express during the week. School life is stressful, especially when you and your partner are on different schedules. There may not be time to flush out every feeling, good or bad, during the week. This time helps us start off every week fresh without holding on to any hard feelings.
4. Interactive Games
Our newest activity is online Scrabble. We will call and play Scrabble against each other. This way there is less pressure to fill time with random chit chat, but instead we are actually playing a game together.
5. Snail Mail
This one is easy, but very impactful. Even though this doesn’t necessarily mean time together, the effort required in putting together a letter (or some spicy polaroids) is a good way to make you and your partner feel connected.
Every relationship is different, but hopefully these tips will help you find more meaningful time with your significant other this week and all the weeks to come!