Comparison seems about as natural a practice as drinking water. It’s around every corner and seems encouraged in every institution. Recently, I had the lovely experience of creating my professional resume and a LinkedIn – yikes. These are obviously important steps to take when pursuing a professional career, but it really catalyzed a self-reflection and comparison to my peers that I was not expecting. I felt myself nervously looking left and right trying to identify who has had an internship and who hasn’t or who my age already has various leadership positions. I also found myself being reassured when I discovered that someone seemed more “behind” than I was. This mindset is dangerous, and I would like to urge everyone to stay as far away as possible.
There are too many areas where people compare themselves to others. A major one being body image. It is too easy to look at either a photo or someone else and immediately compare yourself. Questions always seem to follow even if you have a healthy body image: does she have to workout a lot, do I look like that, should I look like that? It’s important to keep in mind that everyone’s body is his or her own business and beautiful. Just because someone appears thin does not indicate health or happiness and it is equally problematic to assume that a heavier person is unhealthy. Focus on a fitness routine that works for you and your schedule while eating a balanced diet that does not limit those sweet treats.
The other major area of comparison that I have noted is just simply in personal life. This is a broad category, but what I mean by it involves the idea of a “social clock.” Society expects people to accomplish various things by a certain time in their lives. These accomplishments can range from academic to personal life. I would like to throw away the social clock. The only right time for you to graduate college or have your first boyfriend is when it is right for you, not when others expect it. Comparing your timeline to anyone else’s or trying to follow theirs will only hurt you. Love and embrace your personal pocket watch.
Comparison is heightened especially around the time of and following college graduation. Friends have to watch each other take vastly different paths and be confident in their own; this is difficult to do. It is definitely a time of uncertainty but also should be one of freedom. There will always be people who appear to be more successful, have more friends, or lack hardship but focusing on their life in comparison to yours is fruitless. Everyone has struggles, so accepting that finding peace with yourself is what I have found to be the best way forward. In conclusion, comparison is exhausting. It’s exhausting and honestly useless. Not to state the obvious, but everyone has different journeys and things to offer in the world so to try and compare yourself is, well, like apples and oranges.