Recently, I’ve seen a lot of content creators discussing the harmful ways that many men treat women in media, specifically on TikTok. From fat-shaming to dictating the clothes that women should wear, the app has got all of the anti-feminist content one could ask for. If you’re not familiar with TikTok, it’s an app that allows you to upload videos up to 60 seconds long. There are many kinds of videos featured on the app. A large portion of the content fosters creativity and fun, but there are some TikToks that are quite the opposite. This sort of anti-women rhetoric is not new, it simply has a new platform. Magazines and other forms of media from news to social have been doing this since the beginning of writing; however, it is 2020 and it needs to come to an end.
Some of the TikToks featured in Avery Ovard’s video are less harsh but still problematic. For example, one teenage boy expresses that he finds it disgusting when women wear vests, basketball shorts or jeans, while another expresses that he will not date a girl who drinks, smokes, is unathletic, has dyed hair or a “nose percing” (he meant piercing, but spelled it wrong). This type of rhetoric dictates what women and particularly young girls feel comfortable doing. If a young girl stumbles upon these types of videos she is likely going to be influenced by them. “Maybe I shouldn’t cut my hair. Maybe I shouldn’t pierce my nose. Maybe I shouldn’t wear mom jeans or vests anymore.” Thoughts such as these are likely prevalent in young girls’ minds after watching these types of TikToks. Throughout these videos is a common theme: hating and shaming women.
One of my favorite YouTubers, Best Dressed AKA Ashley, recently uploaded a video of her “turning herself into an e-girl” (a popular aesthetic on TikTok). The harmful stigma that we as a society have against women and feminine things is addressed throughout. Ashley states that “women and particularly teenage girls do not hold cultural capital,” meaning that feminine things are perceived as being stupid or vain compared to masculine things. This means that sports, action movies and other forms of entertainment marketed for men are “the cool thing to like,” while romcoms, makeup, fashion and other things marketed towards women are deemed as unintelligent and superficial. This is the reason why so many young girls insist that they despise pink or other things that have been deemed as feminine.
You’ve probably heard a girl say they only hang out with guys because “girls are too much drama” or “I’m not like other girls,” but the truth is they are because all girls and women truly want is respect. Nobody should be told that their interests are stupid, yet we do this to young girls from a young age. Remember when everyone made fun of VSCO girls? Suddenly girls who cared about the environment wore crocs and scrunchies, drove jeeps, etc. were made to feel like they could not be themselves. They were the butt of the joke. This is the same thing that happens to girls on TikTok. E-girls, girls who post dancing videos and pretty much all other girls are being told that their interests, their bodies, themselves are not good enough and we need to put a stop to it immediately.
As a plus-sized woman of color, content creator and CEO Nabela has faced horrendous scrutiny from other users of the app. She uploaded two TikToks discussing one intensely cruel message that she received. After reading the message she states “That’s why I do what I do.” Being constantly told these awful negative things has driven her to be a passionate advocate for self-love and anti-bullying. One of her powerful quotes from the TikTok states “I will not stop to make you feel comfortable. I’m not gonna do it… I’m going to continue to fight for myself and girls like me.” Her strength and her influence are exemplary of the kind of content that girls and women should be seeing on their “for you” page.
Nabela should not have to receive despicable messages such as the one that she reads in the TikTok, but the message that she shares is so important for girls and women to hear. Content creators such as her provide me with the hope that one day we won’t treat women like this. Whether it be a simple comment regarding what women wear to a negative comment regarding a woman’s appearance, words matter. Be careful about what you say on social media because it might impact someone negatively.
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