This week I got to sit down and talk to Emma Gorman about what it was like to grow up in a family that fostered young children.
Her Campus: Hi Emma! Can you tell me a little bit about yourself?
Emma Gorman: Hi, my name is Emma, and I am a sophomore at Florida State University (FSU) pursuing an education degree.
HC: When did your family start fostering kids?
EG: Well, the process to begin fostering a kid is pretty long, so that started when I was in eighth grade. There was about a year of training for my parents, and then we got approved and got our first foster placement in my freshman year of high school.
HC: How did your parents find out about this and what made them want to do it?
EG: Honestly, I’m not really sure. I know that a lot of people in our community saw us fostering and started doing it themselves. I don’t know how exactly they found out, but I am glad they did.
HC: Can you tell me about your first experience with a foster child in the house?
EG: I remember I was in school, and we were in the computer lab. I got a text from my mom saying, “Hey we got a call about a placement!” And I was really excited and told all of my friends and then I went straight home. I don’t remember if the kid was there when I got home, but I remember that it was a little baby. I know we didn’t have her for very long, probably only for a couple of weeks, but it was really fun for me at least. I think there was definitely an adjustment period for my parents. They had to start waking up early and taking care of a baby, which they haven’t done for a couple of years.
HC: Do you have any favorite memories from this experience?
EG: Well, we had this one baby come to us, and she was very small for her age. We had her for about a year and she fit really well into our family. I remember that she couldn’t really talk at all, but she could say the word “cheese,” so she would just sit there and say it and we would hand her pieces of cheese. But I would say that all of my memories with her were my favorites.
HC: Do you think that this fostering is something you would want to do later on your own?
EG: Yes. I would love to do it. I know that it was a lot of work for my parents, but it was so fulfilling. And it was for me too, because I am the oldest in my family so when there was another baby in the house I would help out with my younger siblings. And then, because we did foster care while I was in high school, I got my license and was then able to help run errands and stuff. I know that in particular, the weekly visitations were hard for my parents. That’s when the kids would have to go into the social services building and spend time with their biological parents. I know that it was really hard for my mom because it was kind of a whole ordeal where you have to pack up and get there early and wait for a while. The kids would also be confused and a little disorientated when they got back, so it was kind of confusing and hard for everyone. But I know that despite the challenges, it was a really worthy experience and it helped me see more of the world. We tried to foster to adopt all of the kids we had, but it never really worked out. The number one goal of foster care is reunification, so I’m glad that it all worked out for the kids.
HC: What was your biggest takeaway from this experience?
EG: I think that it just kind of showed me that I and everyone has a larger capacity to love than you may think. It takes a lot to care for a child that isn’t yours and give them lots of attention and love for such a short amount of time. I also think that it takes a lot of compassion to meet with the parents of these kids knowing that in some situations they made bad decisions and hurt that child. And you have to look at them and find it in your heart and treat them with compassion and understanding. So, I quickly learned that things are complicated and not always black and white.
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