During my sophomore year of college, I made the rather hasty decision to get a puppy. Three years later, I can safely say that one rash choice changed my world. Anakin, my dog, shaped my college experience. He has become the center of my world and my emotional pillar. His very existence affects almost all of my choices, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Growing up, I had an almost soul-like bond with my family dog Lily. She had a picky personality and was not afraid to make it known. Lily made no effort with people she didn’t like; however, that was not the case when it came to me. She was my best friend and roommate for nearly 15 years. In February 2020, Lily passed away. I think a part of me left with her when she passed. However, months later, despite still feeling pain from my Lily-sized wound, Anakin came into my life. Growing up with Lily made me think I was ready for my Ani.
To put it simply, I was wrong. I will never regret Anakin, but I was unprepared for essentially becoming a mother. Yes, owning a dog is nothing like being a parent to a human child, but I would argue that it can come pretty close.
My first few months with Anakin were by far the hardest. Potty training a dog in a college apartment complex is a challenging task I thought I could complete in just two months. Once again, I was wrong. Owning a dog in college gets you comfortable with being wrong. Although it took nearly five months, Anakin eventually became house-trained. However, that was not the end of my struggles.
The one part of having a dog in college that no one warned me about is the guilt. The feeling of guilt seems to linger in me since getting Anakin. The first time I went out after getting Ani was horrible. My every thought was of him: I felt like I was letting him down by simply hanging out with my friends. Three years later, I still feel this way. While it isn’t as potent as it once was, I always feel like I am never doing enough for him. Having a life in your hands is a heavy weight to carry when you are just becoming an adult.
One of the first times I felt that weight crush me, Anakin was nearly seven months old. I went to shower, and when I returned, my heart sank to my stomach. On the floor was an empty pack of gum that was full and on the desk 20 minutes ago. I was panicked and convinced I was failing him. Four hours and a hefty vet bill later, he was fine. I, on the other hand, was a crying mess.
I stayed up for most of that night watching him. Even though the vet assured me he was fine, I was terrified to lose my best friend. That terror is the worst and best thing about having a dog. Having so much love for something, the thought of it being taken away is unbearable is a special kind of bond.
Despite the guilt, stress and total lifestyle change, getting Anakin is still the best thing that happened to me. College can be lonely, and facing adulthood is unsettling. Anakin is undoubtedly the reason I can get through the lows. He is my favorite part of the day and the best part of my college experience.
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