I’m pretty sure we can all agree that one of the hardest things to go through in life is rejection. Whether you are rejected from a job opportunity, rejected from a college/grad school or even if you were rejected from a boy (ew), all rejection stings the same way. It takes a shot at our self-esteem and reminds the little voice in our heads that it has been right all along: you are not good enough. However, what about these rejections proves this voice to be correct? While rejection is heartbreaking, it can also become equally valuable when looking at it from the right perspective. Here are some ways to deal with rejection.
Go through the motions
The first thing you need to do when facing rejection is to grieve. Allow yourself to be sad and in your feels! Cry it out, listen to sad music or eat a whole tub of ice cream. Do whatever you need to do to get those emotions out. It is perfectly understandable that you may be upset at this time since the thing you were going after was probably something you really wanted. But you can’t keep those emotions bottled up. If you don’t give yourself time to heal, you are going to let out those negative emotions in places or on people that are not deserving of them. Most people view sadness as a weakness, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Being in control of your emotions and allowing yourself time to release negative feelings is a very powerful thing to do.
Show yourself some love
It’s good to let out those negative emotions and give yourself time to be sad. However, you can’t unpack and live there forever. There comes a time when you have to move on, but with a new perspective. It’s time to build yourself back up! Remaining gentle with yourself is important, so at this stage, you should show yourself love with some self-care! Self-care doesn’t look the same for everyone. For some, it means doing face masks in a bubble bath. However, for others, it looks like going on a run or cleaning up your space! Do whatever you need to remind yourself that you are worthy and enough. A fresh start is exactly what’s necessary after something as heartbreaking as rejection. Being in the right mindset will help you to gain that new perspective.
Reflect on what you have learned
After some time has passed and you’ve been able to process everything, the most valuable thing you can do with this experience is reflect on it. For me, the best way to do that is through journaling. Journaling is such an effective tool because as you write it out, you give yourself a proper amount of time to understand your thought processes and learn. Through rejection, you can learn what you can improve for next time. Like, what were some things that were missing from your resume that you can work on implementing? What can you practice for your next job interview? You can also learn about your needs and values. If you are searching for a job because of money, look into what other jobs you can do to fulfill that need somewhere else. Or, if the thing you were applying to was to fulfill some sort of connection or personal happiness, look at other outlets in which you can find that. If your dream school rejected you, take time to really consider your other options and what they offer. Simply because this one opportunity didn’t work out doesn’t mean you can’t find opportunities elsewhere! You will be shocked at how many resources are around you.
Focus on what you already have and what you’re going to do next
While some rejections truly feel like the end of the world, that is usually not the case. You were happy before you were rejected from this, and you will continue to be happy after. Look around you and start to notice the opportunities that you already have. Look around and see what you have already accomplished. One rejection can feel so much worse than how good all the other accomplishments we already have felt. Finally, it is crucial to focus on something you’re going to do next. The worst thing you can do is dwell on this rejection and let it hold you back from accomplishing other things. Don’t let it! Show them what they are missing out on. Chase after your dreams, focus on yourself and do things that matter for your own well-being. Keep your previous goals and add a few more. You are truly capable of more than you could ever imagine. The most successful people have all been rejected at some point in their lives. However, what makes them different than everyone is what they choose to do about it. Choose yourself.
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