To my dearest, most treasured FSU,
The time has come where I must leave you, but you have to know I do not leave without some resistance. If I could have it my way, I’d be a Super Senior for another four years. I would spend more time being a clueless exploratory major, who couldn’t find anything that fit her sporadic interests in meteorology, music and marketing. After finding where I belonged in the Humanities major, I would purposely fail my poetry classes with Dr. Kerry Evans just so that I’d get to have him as a professor again. I would read the short story book I had to buy for my class with Spencer Wise cover to cover just for pleasure, not for class (oh wait, I already did that).
Courtesy: Instagram
If I could do it all over again, I’d volunteer more and watch Netflix less. But I know that my time here with you has prepared me for the unpredictable road trip of life that is waiting for me once I walk across the stage and shake President Thrasher’s hand. After experiencing the ups, the downs and the opportunities missed and taken, I know that I only deserve the things I’ve worked hard enough for. However, those experiences have also shown me that sometimes, luck can step in and change my course, regardless of the hard work. Luck is fickle. You’ve shown me that that’s okay.
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It’s devastating how quickly these four years went by. And “devastating” might seem like too dramatic of a word, but it’s the right one. College comes, goes, and then it’s suddenly time to make life-changing decisions. Decisions like, where the hell I’m going to move all my stuff to when my lease is up since I still don’t have a post-grad job, when to move in with my boyfriend (and oh god, what will my parents think of that) and how I’m going to pay off these terrifying student loans that are destined to haunt me. In a flash, my worries have gone from, “What do I wear to Madison Social tonight?” to “Where can I afford to live for the job offer in New York City?”
Wasn’t I just moving into Broward Hall and meeting my random roommate? What happened to the lost 18-year-old girl who walked into the heart of Tallahassee when she thought she was on her way to Leach? At what point did I memorize campus like the back of my hand?
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It never feels like time went by too quickly until you’ve reached the point where there’s no time left. I will cherish the afternoon runs taken along the Legacy Walk. I will never take for granted the beauty of brick buildings and walkways or the passionate roar of a spirit-filled stadium. When I think about the times I performed on the football field with the Marching Chiefs, the experience still leaves me with goosebumps.
I don’t know what it exactly is about you that makes you so special to me and to so many others that feel the pull to this campus. I’ll never forget the day I first toured these sidewalks and felt the welcoming nature of the Seminole strangers passing me by. The statues of professors and presidents past gave me an appreciation for your history and left me wanting to be part of it.
I have witnessed absolute wickedness and pure kindness during my time here. I have peered over the edge of the Pensacola Street Garage and never felt lower. I have pulled all-nighters in Stroz and never felt so weary. I have written poems under your branches and never cried so hard. I have made friendships that will last a lifetime and have never felt so fortunate.
Courtesy: Shannon Hickie
As I write this, I look out at yet another gorgeous Tallahassee sunset and know that I will never love another place the way I’ve loved you. FSU will always be a place I can sincerely call home.
Yours always,
Shannon Hickie
P.S. Go ‘Noles