*April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month
Society has made us sex symbols. Photoshop has altered our curves and slimmed down our waists. Models strut in bathing suits with their breasts barely fitting in their tops. Videos of women “twerking” litter timelines and music videos. Just because we are portrayed as “pretty to look at” doesn’t mean that your objectification of us is justified.
Dear Prying Eyes,
When we walk home and get whistled at, we jump from your words and your loud horns. Who thought it was a good idea to flirt with us this way? When was the last time someone in a moving vehicle properly asked someone out on a date? When it gets dark, we clutch our bags, pepper spray in hand, as we walk home on the furthest side from the street. We walk fast, we look all over the place and we wish your eyes would leave us. Prying Eyes, our names are not “babe,” “mami,” “sexy” or any other nicknames you brand us with. We are not animals to be whistled at. We are not animals to be hunted.
When we go out dancing, we shouldn’t have to worry about our outfits being too provocative. We pick our outfits because we feel good in them. We shouldn’t have to worry about whether or not the front of our shirts dip too low, revealing too much of our cleavage and if it will provoke wandering words and hands. The length of our skirts have become a clear indicator of your right of passage. It isn’t.
Believe it or not, we feel your eyes dig into our backs as we dance. We don’t like it, and we definitely don’t like it when you snake behind us to try and dance with us. We have become self-conscious when we finish our third drink because our good judgment is starting to diminish. Your prying eyes are just waiting, waiting to attack your prey when you are satisfied we are no longer ourselves. We can drink, just like you can, so don’t take advantage of us.
When you work with us, we get treated as a joke. Our ideas are just as good as yours. Just because our curves may distract you, doesn’t mean that our management skills or work ethic is any less effective than yours. Don’t think of us as play things to flirt with or opportunities to work on your pick up lines when we are on break. We are not eye candy. We are your equals.
When you talk to us, our faces are where those prying eyes should be. Instead they roam to our backsides… to our chests. We feel that, and it not only makes us uncomfortable, it makes us disgusted. We are more than a number on your scale. We are more than trophies and pin-ups to go on your wall.
Your eyes have pried into our lives for far too long. You have become accustomed to the image of us that society has implanted into your mind. Realize this: we are leaders, not sex symbols. We can cure the next disease, lead teams to success and manage our own companies. We can be as strong as a UFC fighter and as fast as an Olympic runner. We are capable of raising a family on our own. We can be soldiers, mechanics, electricians, lawyers and doctors. We can be the President of the United States.
Remember, Prying Eyes, your mother was in our place once. Your sister may still be in our place and your daughter may soon be. So is it necessary to stare at us? Is it necessary to touch us after we already said no? We are stronger than we look. Society has made us sex symbols, but society has also realized our strength, our unity and our power. We get dressed up for ourselves, not to be cat-called. Along with the curves of our bodies and our painted lips comes a desire to surpass any and all of your expectations. Yes, anything you can do, we can do just as well… maybe even better. So the next time you stare, Prying Eyes, remember we are more than just curves and a pretty face.
Sincerely,
Victims of Sexual Harassment