Oh, Thanksgiving. Such a warm and happy start to the holiday season, right? If you’re doing it right, then you’re probably going to get a little cranberry sauce and a lot of unsolicited quality time with your great aunt that always sort of shows up. Sometimes it only takes one thing to make the day go from warm and happy to cold and miserable really fast
We’ve all been there. As much as we love to stuff our faces with stuffing; the feeling quickly dissipates when the forced conversation results in having to suck it up and tell that great aunt “no, I still don’t have a boyfriend” or, “I haven’t quite locked down that internship.” Sometimes it’s just unavoidable. But don’t worry, if too many cocktails are consumed and your great aunt barrels her way over to you, we’ve got you.
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Ask Them For a Story
Usually your older relatives will want to hear all about your life, but if you hit them with a question before they get the chance to ask about you, you can keep them babbling for quite some time. Odds are they have a pretty killer Thanksgiving memory they’ll be willing to dig up for you.
Avoid Politics, and Overly Personal Topics
The chances that these conversations will go south are higher than the oven that’s cooking your turkey. Leave Donald Trump and your girlfriend’s makeup routine off the table.
Ask Them About Themselves
Older people LOVE to talk about themselves. Regardless of how boring your great aunt’s bingo nights are, ask her about them. Request to see photos of her cats. Talk about her church group, and her book club, and where she volunteers on Mondays and Wednesdays. At the very least it’ll take the pressure off of you, and keep the conversation away from the C plus you received on your English midterm that you’ve recently discovered is common knowledge thanks to your mom.
If all else fails, there’s always room for comic relief with some genuine #thanksgivingclapbacks:
When grandma asks “what happened to your girlfriend?”, ask her “what happened to your teeth?”
If your aunt says “why does your hair look like that?”, reply with “why does your green bean casserole look like that?”
And if anyone says “let the children get their plates first,” you are most definitely allowed to respond with “I am a child of God.”
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Best of luck to you throughout this holiday season, collegiettes. May your wit be sharp and your diversions be clever.