As college students, it is hard not to make a plan and set goals to get exactly where we want to be in life. From the time you were a senior in high school, you had probably decided what college to attend and maybe even what area you wanted to study. Many of us have some expectancy of what college will be like and give ourselves a timeline for milestone life events such as graduating. Unfortunately this is not always realistic and our plans can change over time. If you find yourself getting stressed out when life is not going as planned, here are some tips.
1. Take a deep breath. Understand that this is a phase of life that everyone goes through. It is impossible to be completely certain of the future. Sometimes you think that a certain major is perfect for you, but once you start studying for those classes you might find that it does not really fit you. It is so much better to find that out sooner rather than later.
2. Be honest with yourself. Accept the negative feelings that you have from your plans not working out but know when to move on. Do not force yourself down a path that makes you miserable; instead recognize that it might not be for you. It is important to learn to live with change because life is constantly changing and there is no way to avoid it.
3. Be open to new things. While you might have had the same boyfriend since high school and you always thought you would end up together, sometimes things just do not work out. Even though being single after a long term relationship, especially in the hookup culture of college, can seem really upsetting- take advantage of these opportunities. Sometimes what seems like a terrible situation can be exactly what you need to get you on track.
4. Be kind to yourself. Stop being so hard on yourself. It is hard not to self-destruct as soon as our plans take an unexpected turn. Just because things do not work out doesn’t mean we need to beat ourselves up. We can’t always see the big picture and sometimes we just have to go with the flow no matter how scary it might be. What you want is just outside of your comfort zone.