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Unfaithful: Talking to a guy who has a girlfriend

I’m sure it’s happened to most of us before. You met this cute guy in your class, and you guys exchanged numbers and now you’re texting back and forth. You start thinking that maybe, just maybe, this could turn into something more. It’s obvious you guys are physically attracted to each other, but after talking to him for a while you know there’s an emotional connection as well. That’s when, after either a few days or weeks of talking…he drops the bomb on you. “I have a girlfriend,” he says.

What? Excuse me? Let’s back up here a bit. He’s been flirting with you nonstop, you’re texting constantly, and he was the one that asked for your number in the first place. If he is in a committed relationship, why is he talking to you in the first place if it’s obvious he’s being more than friendly?

This is a question I came to ask myself today when a good friend of mine brought this to my attention since it recently happened to her. She was texting a cute guy she met in her class and they’d been talking for a few days now, though it had been harmless and little to no flirting had been going on, when he drops the bomb on her today that he has a girlfriend. It bothered her, but she let it go; deciding that she would just rather stay friends. They continued talking and she even told him he was free to talk about his girlfriend. It was after this that he sent her a text saying: “I’m sure there’s other ways I could make you happy that doesn’t involve me talking about my girlfriend”. It could be that her and I read too much into it, but that came off as pretty flirtatious and sexual to both of us.

My question, and one I’m sure girls who have this happen to them ask themselves is: why do guys do this? Why do they think that it is okay to be talking to us when they are in a committed and serious relationship? I’m sure they wouldn’t appreciate it if the tables were turned, so why should their girlfriends have to put up with that? Some people say it’s because of boredom, or even because the relationship isn’t working out too well, but in my opinion those are lame excuses. If a man is bored in the relationship, then he should try and work on it with their significant other! However, if they don’t feel that would work then just end it! We don’t deserve to be some idiot’s dirty little secret. We deserve a guy who is going to appreciate us in our entirety and love us…not someone who is going to keep us on the side until they decide to end things with their significant other.

As the fabulous Blair Waldorf once said: 

So has this happened to you before ladies? What is your take on guys like these? 

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